


The Realisation

by LensMind



Category: Free!
Genre: Confessions, Cutesy phone calls, First Love, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Makoto has amazingly bad timing, Misunderstandings, SO MUCH FLUFF, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-16
Updated: 2015-02-06
Packaged: 2018-03-07 18:22:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 26,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3178475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LensMind/pseuds/LensMind
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For Haru, it came slow and steady. It's beautiful like water, and clicked into place like the final piece of the puzzle. </p><p>For Makoto, it came like a storm. A thousand bricks crashing down on his stomach, shaking his entire world and shifting it dangerously out of place. </p><p>If only they realised they'd both reached the same conclusion.</p><p> </p><p>  <i>A bunch of drabbles about Makoto and Haru's evolving relationship</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Haru - Realisation

**Author's Note:**

> **Note: This work belongs to me, please do not copy/dublicate.**
> 
>  
> 
> It started out as a drabble... then I thought I'd post that drabble here... then I edited the drabble and it was no longer a drabble. 
> 
> Think of this as the little cutesy fic I'll be doing on the side right now, because I need an angst break.
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com) ^^
> 
> I am _aiming_ to release one chapter a day. There're generally short chapters, so I want to challenge myself now my assignments are done.

When Haru realised it, he barely even blinked. It happened slow, gradually filling him up as he sat in the bath, letting the water lap against him softly as his hand trailed back and forth across the surface. The realisation was a little like water, he thought; sly and smooth, trickling in over however long it liked, and only making itself apparent when it had enough body. Until, finally, it clicked. 

“Oh…”

Yes, that was how he realised he was in love with Makoto. 

He sat there in the water, feeling the strange extra flutter in his heart whenever he thought about his best friend, and sunk further down. He stared at the wall of the bathroom, idly wondering how long his stomach had been tightening like this, and whether it was something he should be concerned about. After all the years he’d sat and listened to Nagisa rant about the latest school love story, or overheard his classmate whispering about their unfulfilling crushes, Haru felt like maybe this discovery _should_ be unsettling in one way or another. 

Honestly though, Haru didn’t feel like that. He was in love with his best friend, and that didn’t seem like anything grandeur or important. He wasn’t saying Makoto wasn’t important – he clearly was even without the whole love issue – but somehow Haru didn’t feel like this turn of events was particularly life-changing. It was just… fact. He loved Makoto, and that’s all there was to it. 

As he heard the doorbell ring right on time for Makoto’s morning pick-up, Haru closed his eyes. He’d have to do some more research tonight, but from what he’d understood from what little TV he’d watched, suddenly announcing your feelings to your best friend wasn’t the best plan. When he heard the back door open and Makoto’s voice call out Haru’s name (why Makoto even bothered to do this every morning, when Haru was _always_ going to be in the bath, he didn’t know), Haru sunk his head beneath the water and allowed himself two brief seconds to expel any awkward fluttering or tightening, before he sat back up and saw Makoto’s outstretched hand reaching for him. 

“Good morning, Haru-chan,” Makoto said, smiling down at him as always. 

Haru looked at him for a moment, before shaking the access water off his hair and taking Makoto’s hand. “Good morning, Makoto.”

“Eh?”

Haru raised a questioning eyebrow at Makoto’s confused expression as he climbed out of the bath and grabbed a towel to start drying himself off. 

“It’s just… usually you tell me off for calling you ‘chan’,” Makoto laughed, scratching his cheek awkwardly. 

Haru shrugged and focused his attention on getting dressed. “But you’re going to call me by it anyway.”

Makoto hummed and then let out a small laugh. “I suppose so! Well, I’ll let you get dressed.”

“Go pour some drinks, I’ll cook the mackerel when I’m ready.” 

Haru ignored the moan of “Mackerel…” from Makoto as he left, and instead decided that these feelings might, possibly be a little difficult if he has to deal with the insufferable butterflies whenever Makoto was around.

When he wandered into the kitchen a few minutes later and spotted Makoto had poured two cups of tea and was currently looking in Haru’s fridge muttering in despair, Haru decided that he’d gladly deal with the butterflies. 

“Haru, you need more variety…” Makoto whinged when Haru approached and forced the fridge door shut. 

Haru continued walking past him to the stove and turned on the gas. “If I want something other than mackerel, I’ll come to your house.” He silently wondered if social standards meant he couldn’t just idly wander into Makoto’s house now he was in love with him. He chastised himself; of course he would still go to Makoto’s. He may have been in love with Makoto for years already and not realised it, so there was no problem just continuing as they had been. Besides, when had Haru ever lived by the social norms?

He was already placing the mackerel in the pan when he at last tuned into the lecture Makoto had been given him this whole time. 

“… just because you like it!” 

Haru didn’t respond, simply smiled at the familiar morning routine as he flipped the mackerel over. Yes, he may have become aware of these feelings, but that didn’t need to change anything just yet. He’d do some research, think about the situation a little more, and then maybe he’d decide that confessing was the best option (though, already he knew there’d be no love letters in shoe lockers, or calling anyone out behind the school at lunch). Until he deemed that action necessary however, things would go on as they always had. Except with the addition of the fluttering inside Haru, of course. 

“Haru, are you even listening?” Makoto whined as he sat down at the table. Haru plated up two portions of mackerel and carried them over. 

“When I don’t want mackerel, I’ll come to your house.”

“You weren’t listening…”

This time, Haru decided to listen in to Makoto’s (repeated) lecture. If only for the excuse to realise how much he liked Makoto’s voice.


	2. Makoto - Realisation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Makoto realised it, he left timing something to be desired.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I've decided that I'm _aiming_ to release one chapter a day for this fic.  
>  The chapters are usually short, so I figure it's a slightly more realistic challenge XD If I manage it, there'll be celebrations!
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com)!

When Makoto realised it, he left timing something to be desired. It rose without warning, suddenly lifting out of the pit of his stomach only to crash back down on him as he lay in bed. The realisation hit him like a thousand bricks – each one with a million unspoken words and thoughts scribbled across the rough surface. It was painful and unnerving and absolutely terrifying, and it was all he could do to not leap out of bed and take off running. 

He let out one, long shaking breath. 

Yes, that was how he realised he was in love with Haru. 

He realised it as he lay in a small bed, right beside the very sleeping object of his affections. 

He prayed his heart wasn’t _actually_ beating as loud as he felt like it was, and stole a nervous glance to his side; Haru lay there, curled up on his side, arm pillowing his head and mouth hanging open slightly as he breathed softly. He suddenly seemed much too close for Makoto’s comfort, and Makoto was looking at the space on the bed behind Haru with desperate eyes, silently willing his best friend to roll over (and, most importantly, away). 

It was too hot. Haru had stolen the majority of the blanket about five minutes after he fell asleep, but Makoto still felt like he was starting to sweat a puddle onto the bed sheet. His heart was racing, pounding harder and faster than it had ever done after a competition; the heavy beats echoed around his head, a constant reminder of Makoto’s stupid feelings and the stupid timing in which he discovered them. He had to put a ridiculous amount of energy into keeping his breathing quiet and steady. Then, he felt a horrifyingly familiar tingling in his throat and nose. He couldn’t _cry_. Not now. Not over these feelings. And certainly not while Haru was curled up asleep right beside him. Haru wasn’t a heavy sleeper, and he’d always been worringly in tune with Makoto’s emotions, so Makoto knew there would only be a split second between his first quiet sob and Haru jolting awake. Unable to remain still any longer, Makoto sat up and crawled out of bed as slowly and quietly as possible.

The trek to the bathroom felt like a hundred, painful miles of creeping and mouthing obscenities at creaking doors. When he finally made it, he locked the door and sat down on the edge of the bath, running his hands through his hair and trying to calm his breathing. Honestly, he could have done with dousing himself with a cold shower, but that would bring up too may questions from family members who would almost certainly wake up. Instead, he made do with splashing a little cold water on his face (both to wake himself up, and to try to wash off some of the sweat that was accumulating on his skin). He watched the water run out of the tap and bit his lip. 

_I’m in love with my best friend._

It wasn’t the actual feelings that terrified Makoto – if anything, he was over the moon that of all people to be in love with, he managed to pick Haruka Nanase – but what really, truly scared him was what those feeling _meant_. Haru was his best friend, and Makoto was 110% sure that things would get very awkward, very quickly if he came out and said “I love you, Haru.”

The mere thought of saying those words made a blush rise to Makoto’s cheeks. 

How could he let this happen? _When_ did he let this happen? Makoto may have just realised what his feelings were tonight, but he was starting to think he’d been seeing Haru as something more than a friend for some time now. Though, the more he thought about it… this really shouldn’t be so surprising. Haru had always been more than a friend to Makoto, not necessarily in a romantic way, but he was definitely more special than just another friend. He understood Makoto, and Makoto understood him; they shared everything about each other, and there were no real secrets between them (well, now there would be, Makoto supposed). Haru was kind and thoughtful and passionate, and he wasn’t exactly hard on the eyes either…

Makoto shook the thoughts from his head. He couldn’t let his thoughts linger on the ins and outs of these feelings; it didn’t matter _why_ he loved Haru, what mattered is that he was, and he needed to figure out a way to deal with it. He didn’t think Haru thought of anyone romantically, and even if he did he would never chose to love some like Makoto. Haru could do so much better. 

Splashing some cold water on his face again, Makoto forced himself to stop thinking about everything. He needed to get back to bed anyway. 

Getting back into his bedroom seemed a lot easier than getting out – but that was probably because Makoto’s head had been counting down to detonate when he’d first escaped. Now, he was (sort of) calm. 

As he shut the bedroom door and tiptoed back over to the bed, he briefly wondered if next time Haru slept over he should insist that they get the spare futon out. He waved that thought away almost as soon as it appeared though; they’d been sharing a bed since they were little, deciding to sleep separately now would only make Haru confused – or worse, he might even be hurt. Yes, Makoto would just have to keep him and his stupid feelings in check and get used to the fact he had to share a bed with his unrequited love. 

Besides (and he decided this whilst sitting down and watching Haru scrunch his face up in his sleep), it’s not like sleeping beside Haru was unenjoyable. 

“Makoto?”

Makoto froze half-way to lying down. Haru was squinting up at him, clearly groggy and half-asleep. Pangs of guilt and panic shot through Makoto’s chest. 

“Sorry Haru,” He hoped his smile looked slightly more real than it felt. “I just nipped to the bathroom.”

Haru grumbled something indecipherable, but Makoto could tell he was trying to say something like ‘It’s late, hurry up and sleep’. Haru shuffled around, unwrapping some of the blanket from himself and draping it over Makoto’s lap; he then promptly nuzzled his head into the pillow and drifted off like he’d never been awake. Makoto smiled and touched the blanket Haru had offered him like it was a delicate bouquet. Slipping down onto the pillow, he reached around to make sure the blanket was tucked in around Haru’s back. 

It didn’t even occur to Makoto that it was now him who was sleeping probably a little too close before he drifted off.


	3. Haru - Confirmation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Four, Haru decided. Yes, four days since that liquefied love had started seeping out of his pores.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3/3 so far! That's promising, I guess!  
> Hope you guys enjoy this one ^^
> 
> *side note* I'm not getting theses beta-ed, because of the whole 1 chapter per day thing, so I'm really sorry if there's typos - I've tried to pick out as many as possible!
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com)!

How many days had it been now? Three? Four? Four, Haru decided. Yes, four days since that liquefied love had started seeping out of his pores. It hadn’t been _too_ bad so far; he got a little more tongue-tied around Makoto than normal, but he didn’t speak often enough for that to have been a noticeable problem. Besides, if he couldn’t get the words out quick enough, Makoto was always ready to interpret for him. His main concern currently was making sure Makoto didn’t end up interpreting that Haru was in love with him…

Contrary to what Nagisa might say, Haru did find his inability to express his feelings at times quite aggravating – it was hard dealing with people when they kept assuming things about him, whilst he struggled to explain his _true_ thoughts. Not everyone was able to be as expressive as Nagisa… However, currently he had to say he was rather grateful that his feelings didn’t radiate from him; it meant he could go on as normal with Makoto. 

Haru smiled to himself; from what little he’d research in the past few days, he at least knew that not a lot of people were lucky enough to spend nearly all their time with the person they were in love with. 

As he and Makoto left school, he was also thankful Nagisa and Rei didn’t live near them – walking to and from school was one of the few times he got Makoto alone; at school the other swim team members were around, at Makoto’s the Tachibana siblings were always hovering, even at Haru’s own house the cats that passed through his garden were in the way. But that walk along the beach? That was only the two of them, and Haru revelled in it. 

“Did you want to come eat tonight, Haru?” Makoto asked, breaking the comfortable silence. “The twins keep asking when you’re coming over. They want to play Attack on Titan again.”

Haru could think of more exciting things to do than pretending to be a monster chasing around the twins… but he also quite liked seeing Makoto’s terrible acting. 

“If your parents don’t mind,” he said. 

Makoto laughed. His usual, soft chuckle that was like a blanket embracing Haru. “You’re always welcome at mine, you know that.”

Haru hoped Makoto would never tell the world how he managed to make his words sound so warm and welcoming. That trick should remain Makoto’s and Makoto’s alone. 

He kicked a pebble along the ground, and watched as it skipped across the tarmac and landed further along the road. 

“It’s getting darker earlier, huh?” Makoto asked, peering past Haru to the sea and the darkening sky above it. A few steps later, and Makoto was kicking the same pebble Haru had a moment earlier. 

“No more late swimming…” Haru muttered, glancing towards the ocean as well. He kicked the pebble. 

“Like that will stop you.” Makoto kicked the pebble. 

“You’ll complain more, though.” Haru kicked it.

“Because I worry.” Makoto kicked it.

“I know.”

Haru went to kick the pebble but paused and turned to the ocean. The sand stretched out either side of them, and the deep blue of the water lapped against the pale yellow like tender strokes. Before he really knew what he was doing, he was walking off the street and down onto the beach. He didn’t need to look behind him to know Makoto was following him. And when he stopped just before the edge of the water, Makoto stepped into place beside him. It felt _right_ for Makoto to be standing by his side. Haru had never asked Makoto why he stayed with him – he was a little scared Makoto might feel it was his duty or something – but at times like these, Haru didn’t need to know. 

The ocean was peaceful, and Haru felt peaceful alongside it. He breathed in the cool air, letting it wash down into his lungs. Nothing could beat this. He decided in that moment, that it would be during a moment like this that he would confess to Makoto. 

He looked over at his best friend. Makoto stood there, tall and strong, staring out across the vast sea with kind smile. Haru only wished the clouds would clear, for then the orange glow of the sunset might catch Makoto’s features just right, and that would be a sight worthy of a place in an art gallery. Then again… this was nice too; this soft, steady Makoto that Haru got to see. Makoto didn’t need extravagant lighting to be beautiful. He always was. 

Maybe… maybe it wouldn’t be so bad confessing to him… 

As if sensing some words were bubbling up in Haru’s throat, Makoto turned. “What is it?”

No. 

“Nothing really.”

Not yet. He wasn’t ready yet.

Makoto paused for a moment; looking for worry or hurt in Haru’s features. He didn’t find them though, and nodded. “Alright then."

As Makoto turned back towards the sea, Haru promised that he’d confess soon. Makoto may not accept those feelings, but he’d never hurt Haru. And Makoto deserved to know about how Haru was feeling. 

He just… needed to figure out how to go about that…


	4. Makoto - Confirmation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Though Makoto would never admit it, not even to Haru, he rather enjoyed being the only person able to decipher Haru’s thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 4/4 whoop!
> 
> I wonder if you guys can tell from the chapters that I find writing Makoto a lot easier and more fun then writing Haru
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com)!

Haru was struggling. Whenever he was struggling with understanding something, he stared at the paper without blinking for what seemed like an age. And he always got thirstier – reaching out to thoughtlessly take a drink of water every few seconds. Makoto had already refilled his glass twice in the last fifteen minutes (not that Haru had noticed that). Makoto would have offered to help, but he always knew that Haru wanted to work it out himself. If he didn’t, he would have given up by now; since he was still staring and still drinking, and slowly leaning closer and closer to the text book in front of him, it was obvious Haru desperately wanted to do it alone. So, Makoto just kept quiet; slowly working on his own homework and glancing up to check on Haru’s status every now and then. 

Though Makoto would never admit it, not even to Haru, he rather enjoyed being the only person able to decipher Haru’s thoughts. He had always felt it was a sign of how strong their relationship was; a special link that just the two of them shared, but everyone could see. Makoto wasn’t one to flaunt, but he did feel a sort of smug joy whenever someone noticed their bond and pointed it out. It was like an acknowledgement that he was the closest person to Haru – a person who didn’t keep many people close. 

He heard the sharp intake of breath, and looked up just in time to see Haru scribbling down the answer that he’d obviously finally cracked. Once he was done, Haru leaned back and licked his lips – his own smug grin. Makoto made an effort to not stare too long at those lips. 

“Well done, Haru,” Makoto said, refilling Haru’s glass again. 

Haru didn’t look up, just nodded. He didn’t seem surprised that Makoto had noticed his struggle. 

Makoto put his pencil down and rolled his shoulders. “What do you want to do about dinner?” 

Haru’s eyes were watching him now, seemingly deeply interested in something. Maybe he thought Makoto’s shoulders were hurting, or something. Makoto stopped rolling them, just in case that was right; he didn’t want to cause Haru unnecessary worry. 

“I’ll cook some–”

“You had mackerel this morning,” Makoto moaned. “Why don’t we just order something instead? We’ve been working all day, we deserve it!”

Haru gave a hum that Makoto knew was agreement. Without bothering to stand, Haru rolled onto his side and crawled over to grab the telephone that was sitting on the table nearby. Makoto stood and headed into the kitchen to grab the take-out menu that was stuck to the fridge. He started flicking through it as he walked back into the living room. 

“Are you hungry, or are you ok with sharing?” he asked as he sat down – this time next to Haru, and not opposite. 

Suddenly, Haru was leaning into him. Makoto held his breath as Haru’s shoulder pushed against his; he prayed Haru couldn’t hear how hard his heart had started pounding. 

“I’ll share.”

Haru leaned back – it felt all too soon, somehow, even though Makoto was glad to give his poor heart a break. Haru was already dialling, leaving Makoto to point out a possible pizza on the menu: ham and pineapple. Haru nodded to ok it, and an hour later, the two of them were sitting on the couch splitting the pizza that had just arrived. The lights had been turned off, leaving the only light source in the room the movie on the TV. 

“Why did he just believe that she was the star?” Makoto asked through a mouthful of pizza. “It doesn’t really make sense, if you think about it.”

“Movies never make sense,” Haru point out, turning so he lay against the arm of the sofa. His legs stretched right out, until the rest on Makoto’s lap. Makoto glanced at Haru, and then the feet in his lap, and for a split second wished that Haru knew of his feelings: then he wouldn’t keep doing such intimate actions. Though, any action from Haru felt intimate to Makoto right now. 

Of course, he chastised himself a moment later; if Haru did know of his feelings, Makoto certainly wouldn’t be able to spend time alone with him like this. He then had to chastise himself again for looking at a pair of feet for so long – thankfully, Haru was (surprisingly) drawn in by the film, and didn’t notice Makoto’s loving gaze at his feet. 

For some time after that, they watched the movie in silence. The pizza vanished quickly; they had been hungrier than they thought. As the climax of the movie arrived, the feet in Makoto’s lap was suddenly taken away. He glanced aside, and saw Haru was sitting on the edge of the sofa, staring straight at the TV with an intensity he rarely showed away from the pool. His eyes were shining, mouth hanging slightly open, fists clenching on his knees. Makoto’s heart nearly stopped when he realised Haru was very nearly crying. 

On the TV, the lead female was lying on a table with a broken heart, after thinking the lead male had left her for another girl. It was strange to think that this sort of storyline could be moving Haru so much but… it seemed to be true. 

Makoto looked back at Haru, watching his features twitch in pain and worry for the girl on screen. His body ached; he wanted to reach out and hug Haru, to tell him everything was fine, that the film would definitely have a happy ending. Even just taking his hand would have been enough to soothe the both of them. 

And yet… Makoto found himself smiling. A selfish smile, but one that was full of everything he felt for Haru. Luckily, Haru was consumed by the action, or else that smile Makoto wore would have surely given away everything that was in his heart… but Makoto just had to take the chance and smile. This was his Haru. The Haru that only he got to see; the kind, caring, thoughtful Haru. It was always in plain sight, but only Makoto looked deep enough for it; the rest of the world just glanced at the surface. At that moment though, as Haru’s lips lifted upwards in relief as the lead male came to the rescue, Makoto was so thankful that this Haru was his and his alone. He was close enough to see this Haru. 

Just… not as close as he wanted to be.


	5. Haru - Pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Makoto’s been acting strange.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 5/5!! What is life?? (I also have the next 5 chapters plotted out, which is equally as strange!)
> 
> Thanks for reading guys, I hope you're enjoying ^^ Haru had a lot to say in this one, I guess this is the plot starting?
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com). ~~ya'll should come cry over makoharu with me because i am turning into complete makoharu trash and cant save mysef~~

Makoto’s been acting strange. 

At first, Haru thinks he’s just imagining things; that his feelings for Makoto have been making him a little more anxious that usual. But after a week or so, he’s positive it’s not just in his head. The distance between them grows more and more when they walk to and from school; it’s just a tiny little difference each day, but eventually the gap is wide enough for Haru’s heart to lurch when he notices. Makoto’s been avoiding eye contact too; he’ll smile and chat like usual, but will hardly ever meet Haru’s gaze. Maybe it’s a blessing in disguise, Haru tells himself – this way, there’s less chance of Makoto catching onto Haru’s feelings – but Haru can’t seem to make himself believe that, and every day he finds himself trying to purposefully draw Makoto’s gaze. 

Still, it’s only when Nagisa says that that Haru’s heart is stabbed. 

_“Is Mako-chan avoiding you?”_

They’re sitting together eating lunch on the roof, watching Makoto a little away talking to a few other guys from class who’d asked to borrow his notes, and Nagisa just comes out with it. 

“Is Mako-chan avoiding you?” He says it so bluntly that Rei chokes on his food, coughing out a horrified _“Nagisa!”_ , but Nagisa just continues – munching on his bread without a care in the world. “Have you done something to make him angry, Haru-chan?”

It’s like the world just shattered around Haru as he sat there on the cold roof. He lowers his chopsticks, dropping the uneaten rice back into his lunch box. He can hear Rei and Nagisa arguing beside him, but it’s barely more than white noise. His whole body shakes as he glances back over at Makoto, watching as his best friend laughs along with the other group of boys. The _wrong_ group of boys. 

_What did I do?_ Is all Haru can think. _What did I do to ruin everything?_

He doesn’t even know for sure if he _did_ do something – to his right Rei is arguing that very point to Nagisa – but Haru’s stomach churns and twists and tears apart and he somehow knows that Nagisa’s right, and Makoto is purposefully avoiding him for some reason. 

Makoto’s acting so distantly with Haru that even Nagisa has had to bring it up, and yet there he is across the roof, laughing and chatting away warmly with a bunch of people who are nothing more than strangers in Haru’s eyes. One of the boys throws his arm around Makoto’s shoulders, ruffling his hair as he says something to make Makoto laugh _again_ , and it suddenly dawns on Haru that he and Makoto have never done anything like that action. Their friendship has always been a comforting sort of silence – the cool, steady water of a pool when no one is around. Yet… maybe that’s not the normal kind of friendship. Maybe the normal kind of friendship is ones like Makoto has with that boy over there; an exciting bundle of jokes and touches, the ocean with giant waves and a hundred people swimming and shouting and smiling… 

His lunch box dropped to the ground, forgotten, and Haruka Nanase stood and left the rooftop. 

He paused for a moment as he stood at the top of the stairs, forcing himself to catch a breath. He felt like he was submerged, and not in a good way. He was submerged in a stormy sea – every thought pounded against him viciously. He hung onto the banister for dear life as he forced himself down the stairs at a run. 

He needed to get away from that roof. He needed to get away from Makoto’s smile and his laugh and his friendships that Haru didn’t understand or know. Honestly, Haru didn’t know what was ripping him apart – he fact his best friend was pulling away, or the fact that the person he loved was pulling away. They blurred together when it came to Makoto, and he didn’t know if that was normal or not. 

The bottom floor didn’t come soon enough. 

He was running through the school, weaving through the students all chatting and laughing… _They all have **those** friendships… Every single one of them is the bright, exciting friendship…_ For the first time ever, Haru hated that fact he and Makoto’s relationship was different. 

A teacher yelled at him for running, but Haru slowed down only slightly. It didn’t matter anyway, as he’d already reached the shoe lockers. His bag was still in the classroom. His lunch was spilled across the roof. 

But Haru just switched into his outdoor shoes and left school anyway. 

No one stopped him. A few stared, but no one stopped him, and he was so very grateful for that. He wondered if he would see any of his friends if he looked back up at the rooftop – if Nagisa or Rei were looking down and shouting after him. 

If Makoto had even noticed he’d left. 

He was already some way away from school when the trembling in his legs finally became too much. He gasped for a breath, and found himself slowly slipping down a wall until he was sitting on the pavement. A few people passed on the street, glancing at him, but ultimately ignoring him; Haru ignored them too, and simply hugged his knees to his chest and willed his heart to stop breaking–

_Ah… is this the ‘broken heart’ people talk about?_

Except… his heart hadn’t been broken. Makoto had never voiced any qualms with Haru that might explain his sudden attitude change. Makoto hadn’t rejected Haru’s feelings – Haru hadn’t even had a chance to _tell_ Makoto about his feelings… 

And then it hit him. 

What if Makoto had noticed his feelings? It would make sense: Makoto knew Haru’s thoughts before Haru did himself, sometimes. So… what if Makoto knew Haru was in love with him, and was now avoiding him to avoid Haru’s possible confession?

Haru’s heart had never hurt so much in his life. 

“Haruka-senpai?” 

Of all the people to see out here, Haru hadn’t expected it to be Gou… Kou? 

She was kneeling down in front of him, peering at him with concern. “Haruka-senpai, are you alright?” A hand touched Haru’s knee, warm and comforting. 

Not as warm or comforting as Makoto though… 

It took about two seconds for Haru to make a decision then. 

Makoto could not, _would_ not, reject Haru like this. Haru wasn’t going to let that happen. He at least wanted the chance to confess, and since all his research and brain-storming the past few weeks had done little in helping him decide _how_ to confess… maybe he should ask someone with more expertise than him. 

“Kou…” Haru begun, a new sense of purpose temporarily holding his heart together. “I need you help.”


	6. Makoto - Pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The worst day of Makoto’s life started with a pink envelope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 6/6... promising indeedily. Thank you everyone for the kind comments! I hope you enjoy this chapter ^^
> 
> I ended up re-writing this chapter twice tonight. It isn't quite how I planned it to go... but I think it's probably better for it...  
> Warning: the chapter is titled that for a reason.
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com)!

The worst day of Makoto’s life started with a pink envelope. 

Makoto was used to love letters. He was used to envelopes in his locker, or notes in his desk. He was used to being called out by girls, and he was used to politely rejecting them. 

What he wasn’t used to, was _Haru_ getting love letters. 

Haru held the envelope in front of him with a deep-set frown. Makoto could see his thoughts written plainly across the wrinkles in his forehead. _‘They shouldn’t go into my locker’._

“You have to at least read it, Haru,” Makoto said. He may not be happy about the situation, but he didn’t want Haru to just pretend this girl didn’t send him her feelings. 

Haru turned. “Why?”

“She might be confessing,” Makoto explained with a lump in his throat. “And you need to give a proper response.”

“I’ll just say no, though.”

The two of them started walking towards their classroom, and Makoto prayed for anyone to interrupt the two of them so he could be saved from this conversation “You never know, Haru…” he shrugged. “You might like this girl.”

“I won’t.”

“You never know.”

It wasn’t until they were sitting in their seats getting ready for class to begin, that Haru finally caved and opened the envelope. Makoto watched from the corner of his eye, feeling every atom of his being vibrate with conflicted emotions; he felt happy that someone else noticed how wonderful Haru was, and he felt equally mortified that someone else noticed how wonderful Haru was… 

Haru read the letter carefully, seemingly a few times, like he’s trying to decipher part of it, and then shoved it into his pocket. As the teacher entered, Haru’s eyes flickered over towards Makoto. Makoto dropped his gaze immediately – he couldn’t look Haru in the eyes lately, and now he didn’t want to. He was so scared Haru would see the jealousy in them.

The morning lessons seemed to last forever. Makoto could feel Haru’s gaze the entire time, and once or twice even a classmate noticed and tried to discretely point it out to Makoto, but there was just no way he could look at Haru; not when jealousy and fear seemed to be playing jenga in his heart… sooner or later, one would topple, and Haru would _certainly_ spot it. When the lunch bell rang, jolting half-asleep students to life at the prospect of friends and food, Haru stood up and crossed the short distance between his and Makoto’s desk. 

Shamefully, Makoto pretended to be writing notes. 

“She wants to meet me at the bike racks now,” Haru said, voice steady and unreadable even for Makoto. 

“Oh. Ok then. Be sure to hear her out.” Makoto hoped his voice wasn’t shaking. 

For a moment, it seemed like Haru was going to say something else. He stood there, eyes boring into the back of Makoto’s head, and Makoto just hoped he’d say it soon… he was definitely starting to get a little too hot under Haru’s gaze. 

Then, all that came was “Ok.”

Then Haru left. 

Makoto dropped his head onto his desk, trying to release all his tension and worries in one loud sigh. It didn’t work very well. 

In fact, he only gained more tension and worries as he sat with Nagisa and Rei during lunch because _Haru didn’t show_. When it was time to head back into class, Makoto could barely walk straight he was that nervous. When he stepped into that classroom, what would happen? Would Haru be sitting there with a pretty, shy girl sitting right up close to him? Would he immediately turn to Makoto and say “I’m accepted her confession”? Would Haru be asleep on his desk, after rejecting the girl and being too lazy to come find Makoto and the others?

Oh… Makoto really wanted it to be the last option… 

Haru was sitting at his desk, but he was staring out the window so Makoto couldn’t even try to gauge his thoughts. 

As Makoto took his seat, curious eyes desperately trying to read the back of Haru’s head, Haru turned. Makoto’s heart leapt as those deep blue eyes captured his. It felt like an age since they’d held each other’s gaze like this. 

“I rejected her.”

Three words. Three words that filled Makoto with such relief, he had to hold back a wide grin. 

“Why didn’t you come to the roof?” Makoto asked, hoping to quickly move away from the subject of the confession and forget all about it. 

“I was eating with Gou, but…”

And Makoto’s world shattered again. 

He vaguely remembered something Nagisa had told him last night over the phone. Makoto had been too stressed and tired over these stupid feelings of his to really listen, since Nagisa had started the phone call with _“Mako-chan, guess what I heard!”_ which generally means he’s gossiping, and Makoto has never been that interested in gossip. What was it Nagisa had said? Something about Gou skipping school after her dentists appointment? Something about how she’d been seen in a coffee shop with a boy? Nagisa thought she must have been skipping for a secret date and…

…Haru had skipped school yesterday afternoon…

Nagisa hadn’t mentioned Haru’s name but… 

Makoto couldn’t breathe. 

“Makoto? Are you listening?”

 _Haru’s talking,_ he told himself. _I need to listen to Haru._

Forcing himself to breath, Makoto focused back in on his best friend. Haru was frowning, apparently well aware that Makoto had zoned out there. “Sorry, Haru. Can you repeat that?”

“I told the girl I couldn’t go out with her, because I’m in love with someone else.”

And that was it. 

When Makoto had realised he loved Haru, it had been all fireworks and panic and alarm bells. But when Makoto realised he’d lost Haru? There was nothing. No shock. No pangs. Just… this empty feeling. 

And when Makoto spoke, it was with a voice that was clear and steady and lifeless. “Good for you, Haru.”

Haru seemed confused for a moment, and then violently shook his head. “No, Makoto, you don’t understand. I–”

“Haru, class is starting any moment, you should really sit down.”

“But, Makoto–”

“Haru, can we please not talk about this now?”

“Mako–”

“ _Please_!”

Makoto’s breath caught in his throat when he realised how loudly he’d shouted that. One sweeping glance across the classroom told him everyone was now staring at him and Haru. That just made it worse. It just made this moment and this heartbreak worse. 

And Haru stood there, at a loss for words, probably thinking what a terrible friend Makoto was for not wanting to hear about his new love. But, for once, Makoto didn’t care that he was being a terrible friend. He didn’t care if this was upsetting Haru, because he really, _really_ , couldn’t handle hearing about Haru’s feelings for Gou right now. 

Haru only took his seat when the teacher came in and told him to. 

Makoto spent the rest of the day with his eyes fixated on his books, letting the nothingness consume him. 

Nothingness was better than tears, at least.


	7. Haru - Help

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Makoto didn’t come to swim practice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 7/7  
> (Yes, I am counting every day, I'm just so amazed I'm doing it XD)
> 
> Thank you guys so much for all the comments and kudos and stuff ^^ I'll really grateful that you're reading and enjoying, hopefully you'll continue to do so :)  
>  ~~I promise the fluff is coming too~~
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com)!

Makoto didn’t come to swim practice. 

Every time Haru pulled an arm out of the water, it was like he was trying to haul a building out with it. His body dragged through the water: slow, lethargic, useless. It didn’t take long for Kou to just stop timing him entirely, and she focused her attention on improving Nagisa and Rei’s times (and ordering Nagisa to stop asking questions about Haru and Makoto). Haru could feel everyone’s worried gazes fixed on him, but he just didn’t have the energy to acknowledge them today. 

He’d _tried_ , he had tried so hard to just blurt his feelings out like Kou had suggested. But, for some reason, Makoto had told him to shut up. Of course, this was Makoto, so he’d said it much more politely, but Haru had known Makoto long enough to sense what he really meant. 

And “Can we please not talk about it now” had _definitely_ been code for “Haru, I don’t want to talk to you now.”

He and Makoto had never fought before… Haru didn’t even know if this could be classed as ‘fighting’… and Haru didn’t know what to do with himself. When he fought with Rin, it was angry explosions of emotion, but eventually they’d both get over themselves and just pretend it never happened. Makoto wasn’t Rin; he wasn’t going to explode at Haru, no matter what Haru did, so Haru didn’t know how to make things right again. 

His arm came swinging down and smacked against the edge of the pool as he swam straight into the wall. He gasped, the chlorine-tinted water smashing against the back of throat suddenly. Ignoring the throbbing in his arm, Haru grabbed the edge of the pool and pulled himself out of the water, coughing and spluttering as he went. 

“Haru-chan!”

A flurry of panicked voices shouting his name filled Haru’s ears, but he just squeezed his eyes shut and forced the water out of his lungs. Hands grabbed his arms, tugging him up and out of the pool; he couldn’t find the energy in his legs to stand, and let them set him down on his knees instead. A fist pounded on his back to help him cough. 

On the smooth ground, Haru’s hands tightened into fists. 

“Haruka-senpai, do you need the nurse?” Rei asked, kneeling down beside Haru. 

Haru shook his head. “Fine…” he gasped out when he’d finally stopped coughing. 

“Maybe we should end training there for today?” Kou offered. 

Meekly, and well aware he’d never agreed to something to blasphemous in his life, Haru nodded. No one spoke, but Haru was positive they were all exchanging glances above his head; having a silent conversation between the three of them… that was usually Makoto and Haru’s job.

“Alright then!” Nagisa announced. “Rei-chan and I have to catch the train, so we’ll be leaving first. Bye Haru-chan, Gou-chan!”

“It’s Kou!”

“If you don’t feel better soon, go to the nurse, Haruka-senpai!”

A heartbeat later, and there was a _click_ as the changing room door shut, leaving Haru kneeling on the poolside with Kou standing staring at him. 

“Haruka-senpai…? Did… did you talk to Makoto-senpai?” Kou asked cautiously. 

Taking a breath, Haru spun around and let his legs dangle back into the water. He stared across the shimmering blue and forced himself to calm down. Kou didn’t push or prod, just silently slipped off her shoes and socks and sat down beside him, dropping her own feet into the pool too. That would be the big difference between the Matsuoka siblings, Haru decided; Rin would have just yelled loudly until Haru spilled what he wanted to say, whereas Kou was willing to wait patiently for Haru to be ready. 

When she had ran into him yesterday afternoon, Haru hadn’t planned to spill everything on his mind, but Kou seemed to know how to make people feel relaxed. She’d taken him to a quiet coffee shop, sat him down, and just sipped and made small talk about the latest from her friends or her brother, until Haru found his problems were just toppling off his tongue in a tangle. It was like his problems were desperately searching for help, and they had deemed Kou the best option at that moment. 

So, Haru told her what had happened this lunch time. He explained about the pink envelope and the confession, and then how he’d tried to tell Makoto, and how Makoto had pushed him away. Kou was quiet for a while after he finished, but then turned to Haru. 

“And you can’t think of any reason Makoto-senpai would be avoiding you, or angry at you?” she asked. 

Haru shrugged. “Unless he’s figured out that I like him…” Haru hadn’t been able to use the word ‘love’ in front of Gou. “I can’t remember doing anything.” Makoto usually tells Haru outright if he’s doing something wrong anyway – and there’s not much that Haru does wrong enough to make Makoto cross. 

“I see…”

“Maybe he’s just sick of me.”

“I doubt that, Haruka-senpai,” Kou assured him with a smile. “I can’t say for sure why Makoto-senpai’s acting like this, but I’m sure there’s some misunderstanding here somewhere. Maybe you should just try to be honest with him? Ask him what you’ve done wrong, and then admit your feelings?”

“I _tried_ that.” Haru gritted his teeth together. 

“I know, but he interrupted you, right? So, just make sure he hears you out this time. Maybe try to find a more private place to talk than a classroom?”

Haru frowned; why was all of this so difficult? Why were words and timing and expressions all so hard to deal with? Why did everyone else seem to use them easily, when Haru struggled talking to his _best friend_ , of all people?

Maybe Makoto had spoiled him all these years. Makoto had always been by his side to interrupt for him, and maybe that meant Haru had never bothered to try to learn all these social conversational skills. 

Kou gave him time to quietly work it all out in his head, but eventually spoke again. “I still think you should talk to my brother. He might–”

“ _No_.” Kou had offered up Rin’s help when the spoke yesterday – claiming that Rin knew Haru and Makoto better, so would be more help. Haru would rather stick pins in his eyes than ask Rin for help on this topic. Rin had no tact, and right now Haru could not deal with that.

Thankfully, Kou seemed to completely understand, and just laughed at Haru’s definitive answer. “Well, I do think you should try and talk to Makoto-senpai again. _Force_ him to hear you out.”

Haru rubbed his arm, feeling the heavy bruise already starting to settle in to replace the tender red on his skin. He supposed Kou was right, and he was certain she had more expertise in romance than he did, but the thought of forcing Makoto to listen seemed farfetched. He’d never forced Makoto to do anything, mainly because Makoto was always happy to listen to Haru, no matter what silly thing he was babbling about. When they were younger, Haru had once spent two hours telling Makoto why he didn’t like bubbles in the water, and Makoto had sat and listened the whole way through. Makoto didn’t just sit and nod along at Haru, he always _listened_ … well, until now. 

Well… he’d just have to work it out. 

Haru didn’t voice his agreement with Kou, just slipped back down into the water and started on laps again. His body still felt heavy, and his stroke still seemed off, but the water wasn’t thick anymore. Like the water was glad he’d come to a decision. 

Tonight. 

He’d tell Makoto tonight.


	8. Makoto - Help

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Makoto had never been so disgusted with himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 8/8!!!  
> ...Sorry
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com)

He’d run away from Haru… Makoto had never been so disgusted with himself. 

The moment he stepped into his house, his mother had popped her head into the hallway to ask “I thought you had swim practice?”, which only made Makoto feel guiltier for running away from Haru. He didn’t stand around to be questioned, mumbled something about a headache, and made straight for his bedroom. He slammed the door a little too loud, and heard his siblings’ voices squealing his name from somewhere in the house. 

He rarely used the lock on his bedroom door, so it was stiff when he turned it. A moment later, the handle of his room turned and a small body hit against it with a _thump_ , but it didn’t move. 

“Huh? Nii-chan!” Ran squealed. “Open the door!”

A new sort of guilt settled amongst what was already weighing down his body as he tried to ignore his brother and sister’s complaints as they repeatedly tried to force the door open. It took a moment for his mother to come up and usher them away, telling them Makoto wasn’t feeling too well and needed some quiet. 

Makoto dropped his bag onto the floor and collapsed onto his bed, burying his face in the pillow and wishing he could just bury himself for good. Under the guilt, he still felt that emptiness from Haru’s admission. He originally thought feeling nothing was better than pain, but he was starting to wish that he could feel _something_ substantial, instead of the dull, heavy emptiness that was slowly soaking into him.

Haru was in love with Gou. 

He should be happy. The job of the best friend is to be happy when it comes to new loves. Makoto should be cheering Haru on. He should be sitting huddled with him now, asking to hear every detail of his new-found love, and helping him come up with a way to confess or a date idea. 

Instead, Makoto was lying on his bed, avoiding his best friend and morning the loss of his short unrequited love. 

He must have fallen asleep, or maybe he’d been feeling sorry for himself longer than he thought, as the next time Makoto tuned back into the real world it was dark outside. There was a soft knocking on his door. Forcing his body to move, Makoto stood up and wandered over, undoing the lock and pulling the door open. 

“Did you want to come down for dinner?” his mother asked, a concerned smile on her face. 

Makoto couldn’t even bring himself to even try to smile. “Sorry… would it be ok if I passed?”

His mother regarded him a moment, but gave a solemn nod. “Ok dear. Come get medicine if you need it.”

 _If you have a medicine for this, I’ll gladly take it,_ Makoto thought to himself as he shut and locked the door again. 

He was pretty sure he had homework to do but he just lay back down on his bed and stared up at the ceiling. He kept seeing Haru’s face in the back of his mind: hurt and offended that Makoto had just brushed him off when he was trying to talk. Then he saw images of Haru and Gou; talking close over a coffee, both bright red as Haru confessed, holding hands as they announced their relationship to everyone, kissi–

He flung the pillow across the room as he sat up. It smacked against the far wall, taking down one of his posters with it. Makoto bit his lip; he wasn’t sure what was causing him to tremble: Anger? Sadness? Heartbreak? Probably a mix of all three… 

His cell phone’s ring tone pierced the painful silence of his room. Makoto’s heart sank as he looked over to his bag on the floor, the strangely eerie sound calling him from inside. He’d only slid one leg off the bed when it came to an end. 

_Probably Haru trying to tell me again…_

The ringing started up again. This time Makoto actually got up to grab it. He was holding his breath as he looked down at the screen, wondering if he had the strength to pick up if it was Haru. It didn’t matter though. 

Because it wasn’t Haru. 

It was Rin. 

Makoto could not think of a single reason why he would be ringing. Maybe Gou – Makoto couldn’t think of her name without wincing – had told him he skipped practice, and Rin took personal offence, or something. 

It would have been easy enough to just turn off his phone and ignore the calls… but Makoto sort of felt like being yelled at. 

So he pressed the green button and lifted the phone to his ear. “Rin?” 

Rin’s voice came through loud a clear, full of scorn. “The fuck’s going on?” Makoto didn’t question what he meant, just sat on the edge of his bed and closed his eyes, ready to accept whatever grief he got. Rin didn’t have a problem with continuing. “Apparently you’re avoiding Haru.”

Makoto didn’t respond. 

“Shit, Makoto… I was really hoping for a denial there. I thought Nagisa and Gou were just being dramatic.”

Makoto gulped. A lump grew in his throat. “What’s the point of denying the truth?”

“You’re really avoiding him? Why? You guys never fight.”

“We didn’t fight.”

“Then what the hell’s going on?”

“I just don’t want to talk to him.”

“Makoto, you’re not making sense.”

 _I know that…_ Makoto’s grip on the phone tightened. He could hear his voice growing tight as the lump in his throat grew bigger. “I can’t deal with what he has to say right now.”

“And what’s that?”

“He wants to tell me…” The words wouldn’t come. 

But the tears finally did. 

Makoto sat there, open-mouthed as he watched the tears drop onto his knees, darkening the fabric of his trousers. He still felt the same nothingness, but it was overflowing. 

“O-Oi!” Rin heard the wobbly gasp immediately. His voice quickly turned from anger to worry. “Makoto? What is it? What’s wrong?”

“Rin…” Makoto whispered. “I’m a terrible person.”

Rin scoffed, but it didn’t sound as strong as usual. “That’s the biggest bullshit I’ve heard. You’re Mr. Kind.”

Makoto shook his head, even though Rin wouldn’t be able to see it. “No, I’m awful. I’m supposed to be his best friend… But I…” He gasped. The lump was choking him. “I don’t want Haru to love her.”

“Mako–”

But Makoto couldn’t stop now. The words were tumbling out of his mouth, and with every letter and every tear the nothingness was being expelled. And the most torturing pain replaced it. 

“I can’t watch him love her. I can’t be happy for him. I can’t because I’m selfish and I’m disgusting and now I’m running away from him,” His knees were damp, his throat dry, and his voice shook, but Makoto just needed to get it out before it ate him up. “I love him. I love him and I’m sorry.”

As he trailed off, Makoto felt strangely conflicted; he regretted announcing all that more than anything, but there was also this odd sense of… _relief._

Of course, there was also a pretty strong feeling of dread as he waited for Rin’s response. 

Makoto counted two minutes. Two minutes of complete and utter silence before Rin spoke again. 

“Ok…” Rin took a breath. “Before we go on, can you please promise not to cry again? I’m not good with crying people…”

Makoto actually cracked a smile at that. He sniffed and wiped the tears from his face. “You cry all the time, Rin.”

“Shut up. I can deal with myself crying, but other people are an entirely different matter,” Rin grumbled. “Now… you’re in love with Haru? As in, the water-obsessed Haruka Nanase? The Haru who strips at the sight of a puddle?”

“That was one time…”

“Yes or no, Tachibana.”

“…Yes.”

“Ok. Then I guess you better start at the beginning.”

Makoto blinked. “Huh?”

“I can’t fucking help you sort this shit-fest out if I don’t have the full story, can I?”

“Help?”

Rin sighed. “It’s not a hard concept to understand, Makoto. If you’re struggling this much, you’re supposed to ask for help. So I guess that’s what I am today. Help.”

Two hours later, Makoto hung up the phone and stared straight across the room. His body felt lighter. He wasn’t necessarily cured of this pain in his heart, but he felt he could bear it a little better. Rin may have been ridiculously overbearing with his points, but at the end of the day he was right: Makoto couldn’t just sit and wallow without even talking to Haru. In Rin’s own word, “You’re only allowed to feel sorry for yourself _after_ you’ve tried”. 

He had to talk to Haru. He had to come to some sort of understand.

No matter how much it hurt.


	9. Haru - Risk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To: Makoto Tachibana

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 9/9!  
> (Naturally, Rin is ignored)  
> As an apology for the last few chapters, I have finally kicked my butt into gear and delivered some fluff. Enjoy!
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com)!

“Ill?” 

Haru stared at Makoto’s mother as she stood in the doorway. She nodded glumly. “He’s not come out of his room since he came home. I’m sorry Haruka, but it might be best if we all leave him be tonight.”

She looked so concerned that Haru had to believe her; though he had trouble believing that Makoto was ill. Something about the way she frowned said she didn’t believe he was actually ill either. 

Well, he supposed confession tonight was off the table. 

He nodded in understanding. “Can you tell him I stopped by?”

“Of course. I’m sure he’ll appreciate it.”

Haru didn’t tell her that he doubted that, and offered a slight smile in goodbye and turned to head up the stairs towards his house. 

The house was dark and cold when he got home, but Haru was in no mood to deal with turning the heater on at the moment, so he just pulled on the biggest jumper he could find in his cupboard and headed to the kitchen to cook dinner. The gas stove would warm him up a little. It was sometime in the middle of cooking the mackerel that Haru realised _why_ this jumper was so big on him. 

“Makoto…” 

He idly wondered why Makoto kept letting him steal his clothes; it wasn't like he did it on purpose, but surely Makoto must be aware that half his wardrobe eventually ended up at Haru or on Haru. Not that Haru minded, of course. He just pulled the jumper tighter around him as he finished cooking.

The TV was as boring as ever, so he had dinner in silence. He was washing up by the time he remembered he actually had another way to contact Makoto: his mobile. 

Now he just had to remember where he’d put it. 

Half an hour later, he’d discovered his phone in the medicine cabinet in the bathroom – he didn’t remember putting it there, but he also didn’t remember the last time he used it. He only had few unread texts, seeing as most people knew not to bother trying to contact Haru on his mobile. He flicked through them; most from his mother, and none that stood out. He paused slightly on the most recently received message that felt out of place. 

**From: Rin Matsuoka  
** Received: 22-1-15, 20:03  
u nd i need a word abwt my sis. 

Haru had no idea what Rin wanted to discuss about Kou with him, and frankly he didn’t care, so he just deleted the message with a roll of his eyes and went about doing what he was meant to be doing. 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
I need to talk to you. It’s important.**

He paused before adding something else. 

**Get better soon.**

Then he sat and waited. 

For the first time since he bought the thing, Haru slept with his phone in his hand. 

The next morning, things went from bad to worse. 

He stared at Makoto’s mother yet again, completely confused. “Huh?”

“I’m sorry, Haru. Makoto’s really not well,” She seemed less concerned now, but more tired. “He had a funny turn in the night. There’s no way he can go to school today. Can you excuse him, please?”

Makoto was _actually_ ill? That didn’t make sense. He'd been perfectly fine yesterday... excluding the whole acting strange and yelling at Haru, of course. Haru agreed anyways and headed off for school. His grip tightened around his phone in his pocket. 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 08:27  
Feel better. 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 9:12  
Nagisa and Rei say it too. 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 11:05  
I have homework for you. 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 12:44  
Make sure you eat. 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 13:01  
Don’t just eat pudding. 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 13:03  
It’s not nutritious. 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 14:48  
And drink water. It has healing properties. 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 14:50  
Avatar said so. 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 16:00  
Are you awake? 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 16:03  
Makoto? 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 16:07  
Are you mad at me? 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 16:10  
I don’t know what I did. Tell me. 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 16:11  
Please. 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 16:14  
Sorry. 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 16:18  
Makoto? 

**To: Makoto Tachibana  
** Sent: 23-1-15, 16:21  
I’m coming over. 

Haru shoved his phone in his pocket and walked faster. He wasn’t going to check it again; he’d warned Makoto he was coming, so even if Makoto texted him back now to tell him not to, Haru wasn’t going to listen. He didn’t know if he was annoyed because he was being ignored, or just irritated that he couldn’t confess last night after he’d finally built up the courage. He didn’t really care though, his feelings would sort themselves out when he finally saw Makoto face to face – none of these unreliable electronic messages. 

When he knocked on the Tachibanas’ door, it opened almost immediately. Makoto’s mother smiled down at him like she’d just seen her saviour. 

“Oh, Haru! Thank goodness!” She grabbed Haru’s arm and hauled him inside. He stood uncertainly in the hallway as she started running around the house getting things together. “I really need to go pick up the twins, but my husband couldn’t get away from work early. Could you stay with Makoto for me? I don’t want to leave him alone.”

Actually, that was perfect. 

“Thank you, Haru! I’ll be back as soon as I can.” 

Haru hadn’t actually voiced his agreement, but ended up watching Makoto’s mother rush out the door anyway. He glanced around the quiet hallway as he slipped off his shoes and hung up his coat. He assumed Makoto was in his room, but he checked downstairs first in case he was lounging on the living room sofa or something. When there was no sign of him, Haru started heading upstairs. The closer he got to Makoto’s door, the more his heart tightened. 

_What if Makoto doesn’t want to see me?_

The thought was terrifying, and actually made Haru’s hand hesitate as it reached for the handle. But he knew he couldn’t drag this out any longer, so he forced his hand to move the rest of the way. 

Makoto’s room was dark when he peered in. It was silent too; there wasn’t a single sound other than the door creaking slightly as Haru slipped inside and closed it again. He had to let his eyes adjust to the darkness, but he could just about make out the lump lying still on the bed, so he stepped forward. 

Makoto _was_ ill.

His face wasn’t pale, it was _green_. Not including the bright red across his checks, which was probably caused by the same thing that was making him breathe so shallowly. He seemed to be sleeping, and didn’t stir even when Haru sat on the mattress beside him. Haru brushed his fingers against Makoto’s forehead; it wasn’t terribly hot or sweaty, so it wasn’t a fever… 

Haru frowned; he wasn’t used to seeing Makoto like this, completely helpless. Makoto was the one who nursed people. He wasn’t meant to get ill. 

“Makoto?” he whispered. 

No response. Not that he expected anything different of course. 

Brushing Makoto’s hair away from his face, Haru felt his heart squeeze in sympathy. He wanted to help, but there wasn’t much he could do except sit here and watch Makoto sleep. Haru was hopeless at this sort of thing… He sighed at his own incompetence, and leaned down to press his lips against Makoto’s forehead. That was pretty much all he could– 

He froze. 

His lips were on Makoto’s forehead and he froze. 

_His lips were on Makoto’s forehead._

He jolted upright, staring down at his sleeping friend to try to catch any sign of him waking up. Thankfully, Makoto lay just as unresponsive as before, so Haru felt somewhat more relieved... Not much though. 

He just _kissed_ Makoto. 

And he’d barely realised he was doing it. 

His heart was racing, and he found himself looking back down at Makoto’s sleeping face again. Then he was leaning down again. He couldn’t help it; it was like his feelings were started to overflow. It was surprising enough that he stopped himself from kissing Makoto’s lips, and instead let his lips touch his forehead again. 

He was not going to have his first kiss with Makoto whilst he was asleep. Especially since it was pretty likely Makoto wouldn’t want the kiss. And, even though Haru was almost positive his thoughts were going to be filled of nothing else now, he wasn’t kissing Makoto unless Makoto wanted to kiss him back. 

He sat there for a while longer, keeping his hands in his lap where they couldn’t do anything else risky. 

Then, Makoto’s eyes flickered open. 

Haru’s heart stopped as he waited for Makoto to recognise who was sitting on his bed. He held his breath, waiting for the inevitable rejection. 

Makoto’s glazy eyes blinked a few times as he stared at Haru – probably getting his sight to focus – and then they widened. 

And he smiled. 

“Haru…”

The relief made Haru sigh. “Makoto.”

“You’re here?” Makoto tried to push himself upright, but Haru forced his shoulders to stay down. 

“You’re ill.”

Makoto flinched, like he’d just remembered something awful. “I’m aware…” Haru raised an eyebrow in a silent question that Makoto immediately understood, despite his bleary state. “Food poisoning.”

Haru frowned. 

“I didn’t have dinner last night,” Makoto explained, turning over slightly so he could look at Haru easier. “Mum left something out, so I ate it late but…” Haru could see the embarrassment brimming on Makoto’s cheeks. “I was tired… and didn’t realise I needed to cook it.”

“You ate… an uncooked dinner?”

“N-No! The rice was already pre-boiled, but… the egg wasn’t… cooked…”

Haru stared down. Makoto avoided meeting his eyes, turning an even brighter red. 

“You avoid me for one day, and you get food poisoning?” 

Makoto tugged the blanket over his head and refused to answer. Haru poked at the lump. 

“Mackerel has never given you food poisoning.”

“Ugh, Haru… don’t talk about food, please. I spent all morning watching food coming back up out of me…”

Haru cracked a rare smile. He leaned back against Makoto’s big body. Makoto didn’t try to push him away or come out of hiding. They were silent for a while, but (to Haru’s joy) it was their usual comfortable silence. 

“Haru…” Makoto’s voice was small. “I’m sorry I was avoiding you…”

Haru traced circles on the mattress beside him. “I don’t mind.”

“Don’t lie… I was horrible to you in class. I’m really sorry.”

“Makoto–”

“You haven’t done anything wrong! You have to know that. It’s my own stupid problem, and I’ve been selfishly wallowing in it, and taking it out on you. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“It’s fine,” Haru didn’t know what this problem Makoto had was, but he didn’t really like the fact Makoto felt he couldn’t talk to him about it. He glanced over at the lump, and reached over to hook a finger over the edge of the blanket, pulling lightly to tell Makoto to stop hiding. “I’m your friend. You can take it out on me. I don’t mind.”

The lump shifted and Makoto’s head peeked back out from the blanket. “I never want to take anything out on you. I won’t do it ever again.”

Haru just shrugged and glanced across at the far wall. A moment later, a warmth covered his hand. His heart nearly leaped straight out of his mouth. Looking down, he thought he was seeing things at the sight of Makoto’s hand gripping his. 

“I won’t let anyone else hurt you either,” Makoto said – voice still weak, but definite. Makoto seemed to be trying to tell him something else; his gaze was so strong and intense, Haru had no choice but to hold it. 

“Mako–”

Somewhere downstairs, a door opened. The unmistakable shouts of the twins filled the house. 

Haru snatched his hand back and stood up off the bed. He went about grabbing his school bag and searching through it for Makoto’s homework, which he left on the desk. When he turned back to his best friend, he was sitting up in bed, watching Haru with desperate eyes. 

“What did you want to say?” Makoto asked. 

Haru shook his head. _Not now. Not when he’s tired and ill._ “I’ll talk to you about it when you’re better, ok?”

Makoto’s eyebrows narrowed for a moment, but he seemed to accept it and smiled. “Ok. But, promise we’ll have that talk when I’m better, yeah?”

“Yeah.”


	10. Makoto - Risk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So Makoto focused on Haru.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 10/10! Double digits~ ~~If only I knew where I was planning to end this fic...~~  
>  Thanks again for reading everyone! More fluffy times ahead!
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com)!

Makoto stared blankly at the people standing on his doorstep. Haru, he had expected; after all, that very morning had consisted of many texts passing back and forth arranging a time to meet up. Makoto had been fretting about it all morning, actually. This afternoon was supposed to be when he and Haru would have their talk… Makoto would tell Haru that he loved him, and Haru would tell Makoto that he loved Gou – Makoto felt like he had every reason to be nervous over it. 

But, though his heart had been hammering as he heard the doorbell, when he actually opened it the nerves vanished. They were replaced by exasperation. 

“Mako-chan!” Nagisa leapt across the threshold, wrapping his arms tight around Makoto’s neck. “You’re alive!”

Rei reached out and dragged the grinning boy backwards off Makoto. He sighed. “I have to say, Makoto-senpai, I’m a little shocked you let yourself make such an error as not cooking eggs.”

Unable to process Rei and Nagisa’s presence, Makoto didn’t reply. He looked at Haru, who looked like he wanted to kill someone. Probably Nagisa, who was still chattering away about something Makoto was probably supposed to be listening to. 

Nagisa tugged on his arm. “So? Mako-chan? What do you think? Are you up for it?”

 _About what…?_ “Um, yes?”

“That’s great! Told you he’d be ok with it, Haru-chan!” 

Haru rolled his eyes and turned away from the blond who was now rubbing Makoto’s agreement in his face. As Makoto slipped his shoes and coat on, he spotted Haru shooting him a look. For some reason, it was like Haru was saying ‘You’ll regret doing that’. 

Makoto did indeed regret it. 

He was growing curious as he was dragged to the train station. He grew suspicious when Nagisa barely sat still on the 30 minute journey. He was worried by the time they got off at a rather boring nearby town. 

And when they were standing in front of the old, worn building with a sign outside that read ‘Haunted House’, he regretted it. 

“W-why are we here?” he asked, trying to laugh off his growing fear. 

“Hm?” Nagisa looked at him. “I _did_ tell you, Mako-chan. You said you were happy to come!” The mischievous glint in Nagisa’s eyes said he had known Makoto hadn’t known exactly what he was agreeing too. Nagisa skipped forward, ignoring Rei chastising him for picking ‘an outing only you will enjoy’, leaving Makoto to stare up at the awful-looking building in terror. 

“Makoto,” He blinked out of the daze and realised Haru was standing in front of him. Haru seemed annoyed. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have told them I was meeting you today. They wouldn’t have come if I hadn’t said so.”

Makoto waved his apology away. “Ah… it’s ok, Haru! I don’t really mind.”

Haru frowned. “But we were supposed to…” He trailed off, taking a breath and shaking his head. 

So Haru was upset they were putting off their talk even longer too. Makoto didn’t know how to feel about that. At Nagisa’s impatient shout, Haru beckoned Makoto to follow him. Makoto gave one last look at the building and whimpered. 

The girl at the ticket office was very pleasant; dealing with each of them with a smile and wishing them a good time in the house. Makoto felt like it was grossly misleading for what was about to happen inside. 

There were other people visiting the house too, but everyone was told to go in staggered groups or pairs. Makoto was somewhat glad the four of them stayed together, but that didn’t make it any easier to deal with. Butterflies had taken over his stomach completely, and Makoto was starting to really dislike Nagisa for bringing him here the day after he’d been throwing up… The memory of his stomach being emptied was too fresh in his mind, and he was starting to panic that he’d be sick here and now just from nerves alone. 

The four of them were beckoned in, and Makoto said a last prayer. 

It was dark. Of course it was dark. They just _had_ to make it nearly pitch black in the damned haunted house. Makoto could feel his heart beating faster than it ever had around Haru (so fear was stronger than love? Huh, all the movies had gotten it wrong), and he’d taken about two steps before wishing he could just turn around and leave. Somewhere else in the further, deeper and further inside, he heard a group of girls screech. Doors were creaking, lights were flickering, and strange eerie noises emerged from off the sides of the path that was laid out for the guests. Makoto hated every moment. 

To their left, a wardrobe burst open. A low groan filled the air as a shape of a body started crawling out towards them. Makoto yelped, jumping back and freezing to the spot. Nagisa screeched in delight, laughing as he hung onto Rei’s arm and made him walk ahead faster, completely forgetting the others behind them. 

Makoto _knew_ it was just some actor – probably a poor college student earning a bit on the side – but he still couldn’t move. He couldn’t walk past that thing with the groaning and how close its arms could reach if it stretched out. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t…

“Makoto.”

Haru’s voice was firm, ordering Makoto to pay attention to him and not the actor in the wardrobe, but it was full of concern. It beckoned Makoto forward. Haru hadn’t moved along with Nagisa and Rei; he’d stood perfectly still, waiting for Makoto. 

So Makoto focused on Haru. He tore his eyes off the shape and locked his gaze on Haru with a gulp. Hesitantly, he started walking forward again. Haru nodded, a silent encouragement, and only turned to start moving again once Makoto was right behind him. 

It was amazing. Makoto kept his eyes fixated on Haru’s back, on the ends of his hair as they tickled the back of his neck, and just walked step in step with him, and it was like the haunted house was no more. Fear may have sent his heart fleeing, but Haru had managed to calm it. 

Another actor leapt out as they rounded a corner, screaming and flailing his arms. Makoto’s squeaked and jumped forward, grabbing hold of Haru’s shirt and arm. He gripped tightly, dropping his head onto Haru’s shoulder until they’d walked past far enough. Peeking out, Makoto saw it was safe again, and lifted his head back up – resuming his previous task of staring at Haru. If just looking at Haru had calmed him, holding onto Haru was like a remedy to absorb every speck of panic or fear. Makoto felt so warm. 

He didn’t even realise he was doing it until it was too late to back out, but Makoto started sliding his hand down Haru’s arm, taking a hold of his hand instead. Haru’s head turned slightly, like he was checking on Makoto’s reaction and how he was doing, but he didn’t pull away. Makoto’s heart fluttered, and he was glad he was a little behind Haru, so he could hide the small smile that was appearing on his lips. 

After that, the rest of the haunted house wasn’t too bad. With every scare, Makoto just gripped Haru’s hand tighter. By the end of it, Makoto was actually starting to look forward to the jump scares for the excuse to be closer to Haru. 

Though, that didn’t mean he wasn’t happy to step out into the beautiful, safe daytime. 

Nagisa and Rei were already outside; Nagisa whooping and cheering over how brilliant the house had been, and Rei looking a little more ruffled than usual. As soon as they spotted Haru and Makoto, the two of them hurried over. 

“Well, Mako-chan, Haru-chan, wasn’t that amazing!” Nagisa sung. “Bet you’re glad I picked such a great outing!”

Haru just glowered. Nagisa seemed perfectly content with the response, and turned to Makoto, clearly waiting for an answer. 

“It was… different…” was the reply Makoto decided on. He was still a little out of breath after it all (the last few scares were so bad even Haru had rushed out of there). 

“Hmm…” Nagisa smiled and said nothing else. Makoto may have been wrong, but he thought Nagisa’s eyes flickered down to where Makoto and Haru’s hands were still joined. Perhaps Makoto should have let go now they were outside, but… Haru hadn’t let go either. 

“Might I suggest ice cream from that café down the hill?” Rei said, making a point to distract Nagisa from whatever was now occupying his grinning mind. It worked, as the blond immediately started ordering Rei to race him down the hill – sprinting off before he even got a response. Makoto chuckled lightly, and soon he and Haru were following them. 

Hands still tightly entwined. 

They didn’t talk on the way down the hill. Makoto let his thoughts selfishly fill with the feeling of Haru’s hand in his. Haru was a little cooler to the touch than he expected – but Makoto had always been the sauna out of the two, so maybe his own hand was just stupidly hot. His hands were always pretty big, and he quite liked how they seemed to completely encase Haru’s. By the time they were at the bottom of the hill, they were walking shoulder-to-shoulder. 

They only let go of one another when Rei handed them their ice creams. Makoto was listening to some joke from Nagisa, and out of the corner of his eye he spotted Haru staring down at his hand. Makoto couldn’t guess what he was thinking this time, but he wondered if Haru felt the same tingling in his hand as Makoto did right now. He wondered if Haru had been holding him just out of best friend duty… or if he’d held on because he felt the same flutter in his heart as Makoto. 

Now, wouldn’t that be something?

He must have sensed Makoto’s gaze, as Haru looked over then. Makoto quickly looked away, pretending to be completely caught up in Nagisa’s joke. 

As much as he’d wanted time with just Haru today, Makoto had to admit Nagisa and Rei’s attendance hadn’t been completely disastrous. In fact, he had to stop himself from hugging the two of them as he and Haru got of the train at Iwatobi, leaving the younger two on to head to their own town. He waved the train as it pulled away, and once it was out of sight, the anxiety started settling in. 

Walking back alone with Haru… It was now or never. 

Makoto wondered if Haru was thinking the same thing, as they walked in silence for a good portion of the trip. As they reached the familiar stretch along the beach, Makoto felt something shift in the air. Their comfortable silence became tense. 

He wasn’t surprised when Haru suddenly stopped. 

“Makoto,” Makoto turned, facing Haru as the sky started to darken. Haru looked determined. “I need to talk to you about something.”

Makoto gulped as a lump appeared in his throat yet again. His hands were shaking, so he clenched them into fists to try to control them. He could feel himself growing hotter in worry, but he pushed the fear aside and nodded 

“Ok, Haru.”


	11. Haru - Words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I’m not good with words.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 11/11... yikes...
> 
> If it makes anyone feel better, I don't enjoy writing cliffhangers... XD  
> Thank you all for sticking with this silly little drabble thing!
> 
> As always, my tumblr is [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com).

Somehow, Haru was glad that this was the place they were doing this; a familiar place that always reminded Haru of his walks with Makoto. The fact the ocean was right there, waves rushing into Haru’s head in smooth, reassuring sounds, only relaxed Haru more. 

Well… as relaxed as he could be in this situation, of course. 

The day had started off so awfully; letting his plans slip to Nagisa had been a stupid blunder on his part, but in the end Nagisa’s plans had actually worked out in Haru’s benefit. Haunted House? Only that sort of place could offer Haru an excuse to hold onto Makoto’s hand for so long. Makoto hadn’t let go when they left it either, and though Haru was sure that was just because he was still so terrified of the ordeal, Haru himself was silently quite pleased. Maybe it was cruel making the most out of his best friend’s fear, but Haru would worry about ethics when he wasn’t hopelessly falling even further for Makoto. 

And now they stood facing one another, preparing themselves for this ‘talk’. Makoto looked pained, and though Haru didn’t know the reason for it, he found looking at that expression quite shaking. He didn’t want to see Makoto like this, and a nasty, nagging voice in the back of his head kept saying _‘He’ll always look like this now… He’ll always be upset that you love him’._ He tried his best to ignore that voice, but it did speak some truth; Makoto always thought of others before himself, and he’d be hurt to know he was causing Haru pain. 

_Don’t let him see the pain, then,_ the sensible side of Haru’s thoughts reminded him. Yes, whatever happened, he would have to go on as usual. He couldn’t let Makoto even sense that he was upset. He had to protect Makoto. 

It was slowly occurring to Haru that he hadn’t said anything in a while, and Makoto was looking more and more concerned every second. So, he took a deep breath, and spoke slowly. 

“I’m not good with words.”

Makoto met his eyes, concerning slipping for a moment, curiosity replacing them. 

“But…” Haru frowned, working out how to phrase it and unintentionally proving the point he’d just made. “Don’t try to read me. Just give me time. Please?”

He can feel Makoto taking him in for a moment, but sighs in relief when he nods and gives a firm “Ok.”

Good. That was one step out the way. Now Haru could spend a little more time thinking things through. Makoto knew his lack of conversational skills anyway, but he still felt at this moment in time that he needed to verbally tell Makoto to just be patient with him; he didn’t want Makoto to think he was just trying to say something difficult, because there was ultimately nothing difficult about admitting he loved Makoto… it was just the reaction he was a little nervous about… 

“Take your time, Haru,” Makoto reminds him, probably noticing the way Haru’s fists clench at his sides. Haru nods, thankful, and stares at the ground to compose his thoughts for a moment. 

There was so much he could have said: How Makoto had always been there. How Makoto was the only person who could understand Haru’s mind. How he was so grateful and lucky to have had Makoto by his side for so long. He could have listed every perfect thing about Makoto: his kindness, his thoughtfulness, his eyes, his smile, his intelligence, his back, his laugh, his tenderness. He could have talked about how inevitable these feelings were, that he had probably been falling for Makoto for years and years without even realising. 

But, as he’d said, Haru wasn’t good with words. No matter how easily he thought those things, no matter how much was stored up in his mind waiting to spill out, he just wasn’t the type who could put his feelings into words. So, instead he stepped forward and lightly took a hold of Makoto’s sleeve. With one, long breath to prepare himself, he lifted his eyes and locked his gaze with Makoto’s. Then, he said the only three words he really needed to say. 

“I love you.”

He hadn’t meant the words to come out like most of his others: bland and lifeless, but he figured that was better than them coming out all small and scared. 

Haru held Makoto’s gaze, watching every tiny movement of his face, ready to step back and let go if Makoto showed even the slightest bit of discomfort. For a moment, he couldn’t really see any change; Makoto just remained staring down at him with steady eyes. Then Haru could see the spark light in his best friend’s mind. He saw the way his eyes lit up in understanding and widened ever-so-slightly in shock. Makoto’s chest trembled as he took in a shaky breath. His mouth parted a little, but Haru could tell that he wasn’t ready to produce words just yet. He let go of Makoto’s sleeve, moving to take a step back – deciding that Makoto probably needed a bit more space to process that news. 

Makoto’s hand shot out and grabbed his wrist, stopping him before he moved too far away. 

“But you love Gou.”

Haru blinked. 

He was in love with Kou? That was definitely news to him. He frowned in silent question. Makoto opened his mouth to respond but stopped himself before even getting out a syllable. He seemed to be sticking by Haru’s previous request to not read his expression, so Haru reluctantly voiced his thoughts. 

“No, I don’t.”

Makoto’s face was crumpling up in confusion. “Yes, you do.”

“ _No,_ ” Haru said firmly. “I love _you._ ”

“But all that sneaking around?” Makoto was speaking quickly now; his panicked thoughts tumbling out without thought. “You were meeting her in private, and you rejected that girl at school because you said you were in love with Gou.”

“I said I was in love with someone else. That person is you.” Haru felt a pout pulling at his lips. He didn’t much like being told who he was in love with after just confessing. 

Makoto stared at him more, and Haru couldn’t actually understand what he was thinking. He seemed… desperate? Upset? Whatever it was, it wasn’t a reaction Haru was expecting, and it certainly didn’t make sense alongside the hand that was still gripping his wrist like there was nothing more precious on the Earth. 

“You love… _me_?” Makoto voice was barely a whisper. 

“Yes.”

Makoto’s eyes started glistening, and Haru _did_ recognise that sign. Sure enough, Makoto’s bottom lip was trembling, and he slapped a hand over his face. Haru was suddenly pulled forward a step as Makoto sunk downwards, crouching on the ground and hiding his face, and his hand slipped down Haru’s wrist until it caught his hand. _Just like in the haunted house,_ Haru thought, giving the hand a worried squeeze. 

“Why?” Makoto breathed. “Why me?”

Haru felt his heart sink. He stared at the top of Makoto’s head, pain rippling through his heart at the reaction. Of course this was the reaction; he was pretty much ruining their friendship. 

His voice was softer when he spoke. “It’s always been you… I’m sorry.”

Makoto let out a strange noise that was somewhere between a laugh and a sob, making his whole body tremble slightly. He gave a loud sniff, and wiped his face with his hand before lifting his head. 

His smile knocked the breath right out of Haru. 

“Don’t be sorry, Haru. Never be sorry,” Makoto squeezed his hand tighter, and pulled it down, pressing his forehead onto Haru’s hand and letting out another laughing-sob. “I’m _so_ happy.”

_Oh._

This time, the realisation hit him fast. All at once. A giant punch in the gut in the most beautiful way. It was the feeling of dive-bombing into a perfectly still pool – a great crash of waves and ripples that hit every part of the surface and the depths beneath. 

And that was how he realised Makoto loved him back.


	12. Makoto - Words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Haru was still watching, waiting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 12/12!!!!!!  
> And let the fluff commence...
> 
> You guys can find me on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com) where I'll be squealing over all the fluff I can write for this fic from now on.

The realisation was slow and steady. It built up brick by carefully place brick, until it lifted Makoto up high enough to see what was standing right in front of him. He could see the focus in Haru’s eyes as he tried to pick out every word before he spoke it; Makoto had never seen Haru thinking so carefully about how to vocalise his thoughts, and that alone made Makoto realise just how serious whatever Haru wanted to say was. He could see how nervous Haru was, and when he finally met Makoto’s gaze, Makoto saw what he hadn’t all this time: the bright, brimming feelings and just who they were really directed to. Makoto knew what words were about to come out of Haru’s mouth before he spoke. 

And that was how he realised Haru loved him back. 

The confirmation was more amazing than the realisation. Those three words “I love you” rang around Makoto’s head over and over, a blissfully sweet sound. He couldn’t quite believe it; and clearly Haru started to get a little aggravated at repeatedly saying that he was meant to be in love with Gou. 

In the end, all Makoto could really do was crouch on the ground gripping Haru’s hand, and deciding there and then that he never wanted to let go of this hand again. 

“Makoto…” Haru called from above. 

Forcing himself to look back up, Makoto found Haru’s eyes staring back down at him – wide, on edge, hopeful. Of course, of course Haru had worked out Makoto’s feelings from his reaction, but Haru didn’t want a reaction. He wanted a _response_.

Makoto smiled and gave a small nod, but it wasn’t a response – just a request for Haru to wait a moment longer. Haru understood; he could probably see the muddled thoughts rushing around inside Makoto’s head. He started moving downwards, crouching down on the ground opposite Makoto, and stared down at their joined hands with the smallest smile. 

“Avoiding you was wrong, and stupid, and selfish,” Makoto begun. Haru glanced up at him, chewing the inside of his cheek. Makoto just squeezed his hand tighter. “I was scared of hearing something I didn’t want to hear, and…” He laughed and dipped his head again, embarrassed. “Ugh… I was so wrong, wasn’t I?”

“I’m not in love with Kou,” Haru said blandly, as if trying to reaffirm the fact. 

“Yeah…” Makoto sighed, laughing at his own stupidity even more. “I was supposed to tell you my feelings first. I’d built myself up and everything.”

Haru was still watching, waiting. 

“I love you too, Haru.”

The way Haru’s face lit up was like nothing Makoto had seen before, and he wanted nothing more than to just leap forward and wrap his arms around Haru in that moment, but that would have involved looking away from that perfect face. 

“My legs hurt,” Haru said, bringing Makoto’s attention to the fact they were both struggling to stay crouched after so long. With a warm chuckle, Makoto put a hand on his knee and pushed himself to his feet – his legs groaned at the feat – and tugged Haru upwards after him. This time though, he brought Haru closer as well.

They stood for a while, staring at one another and feeling the warmth passing between their hands, nearly chest to chest, until Haru dipped his head and leaned forward. He cushioned his face just beneath Makoto’s chin, and the hot breath on his skin managed to make Makoto shiver. Almost without thinking, Makoto lifted his free arm and wrapped it around Haru’s waist, pulling him even closer. Makoto didn’t care how impossible it was; he wanted to never be further away from Haru as they were then. 

“I love you, Haru…”

Haru nodded against him, lifting his own free arm to clutch at the back of Makoto’s shirt like he never planned to let go. Makoto was ok with that. He just closed his eyes and hid his face in Haru’s hair. 

“I really, really love you…”

Haru voice came out muffled. “You can stop saying it now.”

Makoto laughed, blushing at the comment, but his smile immediately started to fade when Haru starting pulling out of the embrace. Blue eyes met his gaze, telling him of the next thing Haru wanted. The time for words was over and done with, and Makoto was back to reading Haru like a book. 

_Kiss me._

That’s what Haru’s eyes said. 

He wouldn’t have been able to refuse even if he wanted to… 

Haru’s hand gripped the neckline of his shirt, pulling him downwards. Makoto’s heart fluttered as Haru’s eyelids lowered, and his breath was catching as he leaned closer and closer. 

“Haru?” he breathed when they were only a tiny bit apart. “Have you spoken to Rin recently?”

Haru’s eyes snapped open. 

He was glaring. “Why are you talking about Rin now?”

“I-It’s just–”

“Don’t.” 

Makoto clenched his eyes shut at Haru’s voice – it was just dripping with annoyance, and he felt so bad for ruining the mo–

With one last tug, his lips were against Haru’s. 

He didn’t think much. He _couldn’t_ think much. His brain was turning to putty, drifting away on a thought of how soft Haru’s lips were, how well they seemed to fit against his. 

Though, the longer they remained like that, the more Makoto thought about how little he knew of all this stuff. 

Haru must have sensed his sudden worry, as he pulled back and arched an eyebrow. Makoto fumbled with the right words. 

“I just… I’m a little new at this I guess…” He laughed, hoping it would hiding his awkwardness, but Haru sighed – spotting it straight away. 

“We’ll figure it out,” he said, shrugging away any doubts he might have secretly been having. Makoto smiled at how easily Haru seemed to deal with it, and this time it was him who leaned down to press their lips together again. 

It was a little uncertain, and maybe it wasn’t some mind-blowing movie kiss, but it seemed to suit the two of them just fine; simple, slow, and showing every bit of their feelings for one another. That was the day Makoto learnt he and Haru could have silent conversations through more than just looks. 

Haru’s hand skimmed against Makoto’s arm, and Makoto knew it was the sign to pause again. This time, it was a proper pause; they still had to get home at some point tonight whether they wanted to or not. The agreement to head off was made through nods, and Makoto reluctantly released his hold on Haru so they could walk side by side. 

Their hands remained tightly wound together. 

“Haru?”

“Hm?”

“You really need to clear some stuff up with Rin.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, sadly tomorrow may have to be the first break in my updates - I have a super important interview, and then have to pack to go back to uni when I'm done, so depending on time ~~and my emotional trauma levels~~ I may not be able to write an update for you!
> 
> We shall see though, and either way I'll definitely be posting the next chapter Wednesday!
> 
> Thanks everyone for sticking with this story, you have no idea how much I appreciate it ^^


	13. Haru - Calls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Haru was certain now that if they just went with the flow, they’d work out how this whole romance thing went. 
> 
>  
> 
> _((or, Haru cares little for Rin and/or the social graces of phone calls))_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaand, back to normal ~~broadcasting~~ posting!  
>  And since we're back, might as well get started on that fluff that I promised, huh? 
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com), where I shall no doubt be desperately trying to escape the fact that uni has started up once again!
> 
> Again, thanks to all you lovelies for reading! Much appreciated ^^

It was a rare occurrence for Makoto and Haru to misunderstand one another, and Haru decided the night he confessed that the whole ‘love’ situation was the worst misunderstanding possible. Not only did it put a strain on his and Makoto’s friendship and make them doubt one another, but it meant he had to deal with the biggest problem caused by Makoto’s assumptions. 

Rin.

Haru sat on his bed, growing more and more annoyed, as he tried for the forth time to interrupt Rin’s angry yells. Makoto sat across at Haru’s desk, looking more sheepish with every second that passed. Haru hadn’t _wanted_ to call Rin to tell him that Makoto had gotten it wrong and he was most certainly _not_ in love with Gou (the thought still seemed ridiculous), but Makoto had been adamant that the longer they wait, the more difficult it would be. Actually, it was Makoto who initially called Rin, but Rin had heard Haru in the background and demanded to be passed over. 

It had been half an hour since Haru had taken the phone, and he hadn’t gotten a word in. 

He huffed; this was supposed to be the first precious hours spent with Makoto. They were supposed to be discussing what was going on from here (or, well, Haru would have actually preferred if they just did that whole kissing thing again, since that was pretty great). But no. He was spending the time on the phone to _Rin_ of all people. It was cruel. 

He tuned back into Rin for a moment. “And another thing, you sister-stalking creep…!” 

He tuned right back out. 

Across the room, Makoto mouthed “I’m sorry” again, and Haru decided then and there that he wasn’t in the mood to waste time with Rin. Makoto had a point; if he waited any longer to explain things, it would just get worse, so… he’d let Rin have his little hissy fit. 

That didn’t necessarily mean Haru had to _listen_ to it. 

He placed the phone down on his bedside table – the muffled sound of Rin’s yells could still be heard, so Haru would probably notice if he stopped expecting a reply. Makoto looked horrified at Haru’s actions, but obviously figured he was in no position to be telling Haru off for anything right now. 

Pushing himself to his feet, Haru wandered across the room and stood right up against Makoto’s knees. He stared at him pointedly, hoping Makoto would get the hint. 

He did, and immediately turned bright red, but took the hand that Haru then held out to pull himself to his feet. Makoto may have no approved of ignoring Rin like that, but Haru somehow didn’t think he would complain once their lips met again. 

He still had mixed feelings about kissing. It was pretty great, no denying it, but Haru got the feeling that it was only great because he was doing it with Makoto. It was a strange sensation; he hadn’t experienced anything other than pecks on the cheeks from relatives and one girl in elementary school during a school play. He figured the oddness of it would pass in time, and that he was simply just inexperienced in the act. Makoto was also inexperienced though, so Haru didn’t feel completely ridiculous when he was at a complete loss for what to do. 

At the same time though, kissing Makoto filled him with this wonderful warmth; like it was something he was meant to be doing. His body seemed to know what to do really – wrapping his arms around Makoto to keep them pressed against each other was definitely the best use of his arms. He’d wrap his legs around Makoto too if he could – cling to him as tightly as possible and for as long as possible – but sadly legs were required for standing. 

“Haru… the phone…” Makoto whispered against his lips. 

Haru paused for the shortest time necessary and shrugged. “He’s still shouting.”

He pushed his lips against Makoto’s again, revelling in that warmth. He wanted to steal as much of it as he could, and by the way Makoto was pushing against him and tightening his fingers in his hair, he must have felt the same way. He was stronger than Haru, and with each press forward, Haru had to take a stumbling step backwards. They kept at it; moving across the room without even thinking, barely pulling apart for breath, until Haru’s knees hit the edge of his bed and he couldn’t go any further. 

The mood shifted, turning the kiss into something much more intimate. Makoto felt it at the same time, and the two of them flinched and slowed – unsure and uncertain and constantly trying to gauge the other’s reaction. Haru wasn’t sure who started it, or if it was even on purpose, but soon he found himself nipping at Makoto’s bottom lip, and opening his mouth to him. Makoto gasped against him, and it took all of one millisecond for Haru to decide he really wanted to make Makoto gasp like that again. The kiss stayed slow; their tongues testing the waters bit by bit, exploring the new sensations carefully. 

Then it just clicked for the both of them: this was right. And the caution vanished. Their holds grew tighter, kisses became needy, and Haru had all but forgotten about the phone on the table when Makoto gave another one of those gasps. 

“H-Haru… we should…” He didn’t feel like letting Makoto speak, so he just kept kissing him. Makoto didn’t seem too bothered, suddenly pushing against Haru forcefully enough that he toppled backwards onto the bed. He stared up as Makoto stood over him; Makoto seemed nervous, like he was still not entirely convinced that this wasn’t exactly what Haru wanted. Haru reached out an arm, opening his hand. The silent exchange of agreement passed easily enough, and Makoto’s fingers laced with his. He started leaning down, biting his lip to hide the smile Haru knew was trying to break out. 

Yes. Haru was certain now that if they just went with the flow, they’d work out how this whole romance thing went. 

_“HARU? HARU!”_

For a moment, Haru was certain Rin was purposefully sabotaging his time with Makoto. Until he remembered that Rin still knew nothing about said time, of course. Makoto pulled back from the kiss, looking horrified that he’d forgotten about the phone. He was about to move to get up, but instead just let out a yelp as Haru flipped the two of them over.

_“What was that? HARU? Are you even fucking there?”_

Haru snatched the phone from the table, and pressed it to his ear. “Rin. I’m not listening, I’m kissing Makoto. And I love him, not Gou.”

 _“You’re kiss… Wait,_ what _?”_

Haru’s finger pressed down on the red button and he flung the phone across the room. He was satisfied with the _thump_ as it bounced across the floor. 

He stared down at Makoto beneath him, panting heavily and praying he hadn’t overstepped his mark. Makoto must have seen the worry in his eyes, as he shook his head. 

“Haru…” Makoto sighed, covering his face in exasperation. “You can’t do it like that!”

“It was taking too long.”


	14. Makoto - Calls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Haru’s voice was amazing to listen to, even through the phone. Makoto

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was by FAR my favourite chapter to write because **FLUFF**
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading! I don't deserve just perfect readers!!
> 
> I'm on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com) as usual!

It had been three days since Haru and Makoto confessed to one another, and incidentally, it had also been three days since Makoto was able to do anything but smile. He and Haru weren’t planning on exactly announcing their relationship – they felt it was a rather natural progression, and people wouldn’t question it if they started acting a little clingier, or maybe holding hands on the way home. Neither of them were particularly comfortable with the thought of PDA either, so they didn’t have to worry about people seeing them kiss at school. Nagisa and Rei knew, of course; Rin had apparently called them both after Haru’s awful phone call to ask what was going on, so when Haru and Makoto got to school the following Monday, they were immediately bombarded with prying questions (mainly from Nagisa, but Rei made no attempts to silence him…)

Nothing really mattered though, because Makoto was just so damn _happy_ all the time. His siblings stared at him as he wandered around with a constant goofy grin, but his parents didn’t seem particularly concerned – though they did exchange a few knowing glances over every meal that they thought Makoto wasn’t catching. (He was smiling, not blind). 

As Makoto stood to start clearing the table after their dinner, his mother snatched the plate from his hand and waved him off. “Makoto, you don’t have to clean up tonight, its fine. Go see Haru, or something.”

Makoto blinked. “But–”

“She’s right,” His father didn’t even look up from his newspaper. “We’d like you to be a normal, unhelpful teenager once in a while.”

Makoto laughed, rubbing the back of his neck, and thanked them. Though, as he started heading up to his bedroom, he felt somewhat annoyed that he no longer had something to do. He _would_ have gone to see Haru, but Haru was busy tonight – after the incidents of the past few days, he’d ended up being dragged to some professional swimming event by Rin (though, it was later revealed that Haru was only asked because Sousuke couldn’t attend, and Rin was too annoyed to let the spare ticket go to waste). 

As he shut himself in his room, he checked his phone. There was still five more hours until Haru and Rin were expected to be back, and that meant there were five hours for Makoto to distract himself for…

He managed to drag out his maths homework for an hour. 

He bribed the twins to ‘force’ him to play with them for two more, before they had to get a bath and then sent to bed. 

He spent forty-five minutes having his own bath (before his parents ordered him to get out, and then promptly warn him not to “gain Haruka’s bad habits!”. 

He then forced himself to: read (none of the books on his shelf seemed interesting), play video games (not as fun when Haru wasn’t here to play against), browse the internet (who knew the world wide web was so boring?), and he even contemplated going to watch soaps with his mother downstairs, but he could never be that desperate. 

Eventually he lay in bed at 9:45pm, staring at his phone on the pillow next to him, waiting for the text off Haru to say he’d gotten back safe and sound. It would be too late for them to meet, so Makoto figured tonight would have to be an early night, and he could just see Haru bright and early tomorrow. 

His phone buzzed right on cue, fifteen minutes later, and Makoto basically leapt the small distance across his bed to open the text. 

**From: Haru  
Home. Goodnight.**

He laughed at the message; Haru never had been one for texting – the brief day during Makoto’s illness being the exception, of course. He typed out a reply and sent it off before curling up in bed and actually trying to sleep. 

**To: Haru  
Goodnight Haru. I hope you had a good time. Sleep well! ^^**

Five minutes later, Makoto’s phone buzzed again. 

**From: Haru  
Are you busy?**

Makoto stared at the text, trying to read Haru’s thoughts through the few words on screen – of course, that wasn’t possible. Instead, he typed out a reply. This time, he stayed sitting upright in bed, waiting for the response. 

**To: Haru  
Nope! I don’t really have much to do when you’re not around, haha! XD**

The reply didn’t come quickly, but Makoto kept staring down at his phone anyway. It buzzed again after another five minutes or so, but it didn’t buzz once… it kept buzzing. 

Haru was calling? 

For a moment, Makoto could only stare at the call screen, wondering if Haru had fallen asleep on his phone, or was pocket dialling him somehow, because Haru _never called_. He was also very aware that Haru _never called_ and he should probably answer it because of that very reason. 

So he did. 

“H-Haru?” Makoto asked, though he knew it couldn’t be anyone else.

_“Sorry I didn’t see you tonight.”_

Haru’s voice was amazing to listen to, even through the phone. Makoto smiled and held the phone to his ear like it was the dearest thing to him. 

“It’s not like I didn’t see you at school all day,” he laughed. “Besides, Rin never gets to hang out with you much.”

_“He’s noisy. And over-enthusiastic.”_

“Or you’re just quiet and under-enthusiastic about everything but water?” Makoto offered. He could tell Haru saw the point, as he gave a small huff. Makoto slid back down into bed, curling up under the cover and keeping the phone right against his ear. “Aren’t you going to sleep soon?”

_“Probably.”_

“Why call then?” There was a vague rustling noise, but Haru didn’t bother replying. Makoto chuckled. “Haru, you can’t just shrug when I can’t see you doing it.”

_“You knew I did it though.”_

“Because you’re Haru,” Makoto said proudly. “I know you.”

_“Yeah.”_

They were silent for a few minutes longer; Makoto lay quietly, listening to the sound of Haru moving about his house, and felt strangely comforted by the simplicity of the call. It seemed like this sort of phone call suited them well; it wasn’t so much the words that were important, but just the knowledge that the other person was just a whisper away. Makoto would have preferred Haru to be just a finger length away, but a whisper would do for now. He quietly wondered if it was strange that he knew exactly what Haru was doing, just from vague noises across a phone. He heard the quiet whistle of the kettle as Haru made his usual tea before bed. He heard the tiny clicks as Haru turned the lights off. He heard the slight creak in Haru’s bedroom door as it swung shut. He even heard the small rustles of Haru getting changed for bed – he may have blushed slightly at that one. 

Then, he listened to the familiar movement of bedcovers, and a moment later, Haru sighed and Makoto knew he had climbed into bed too. 

_“Makoto.”_

“I’m here, Haru.”

_“I know.”_

Makoto smiled, and shut his eyes lightly. “I seem to have little life when you’re not around.”

_“Hm?”_

“Or, maybe I just can’t be bothered with what life I do have when you’re not around. Think that’s bad?”

_“No.”_

Makoto could hear Haru’s steady breathing. It was a soothing sound. He felt his body growing lighter as he listened to it. 

“I miss you.”

_“We’re in bed early.”_

“Yeah?”

_“So we’ll be awake earlier.”_

“I suppose…?”

_“You can come over earlier.”_

Makoto laughed again, his heart warming and his stomach tightening at how happy Haru’s words made him. He heard a lot of people talking about how the early stages of a relationship were always the most exciting and that all those fluttery feelings vanished over time, but Makoto didn’t think these feelings for Haru would ever dim. He certainly hoped they wouldn’t, at least. 

“I’ll be there earlier,” he promised. 

_“I’ll make breakfast.”_ Somehow Makoto knew Haru was smiling. _“If you come early enough, it won’t be mackerel.”_

At some point, they both fell asleep – phones still on and tightly pressed against their ears.


	15. Haru - Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Haru didn’t understand the appeal of dates.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKOKOKOK important stuff
> 
> So, because I'm lazy af and uni as started up again, I figured that I'd throw this fic out to you guys now! I obviously do have certain plans and stuff, but since I've already got one person who beautifully offered me an idea, why don't I just let anyone do it?
> 
> So yeah... there we are! Short chapter this time, but the next one will be longer for reasons that will become obvious :D

Whenever Nagisa was butting his nose in where it didn’t belong, he tended to lean right in close and prod someone in the side. Over and over and over. Haru, thankfully, wasn’t usually the one who had to deal with such things, but this lunchtime it seemed he wasn’t so lucky. 

“Haru-chan! Listen up, already!” Nagisa moaned into his ear, keeping his voice low enough so the others sitting with them wouldn’t hear. Haru looked over at the others; Rei and Makoto were in some deep conversation about a book they’d both just finished reading, so they wouldn’t have noticed Nagisa badgering Haru anyway. (Haru wondered if Makoto would sense his distress if he stared at him long enough). 

Sighing, Haru gave in and turned to the annoying blond (but only because he was sure he was now going to have a bruise from the consistent poking).

“How long have you and Mako-chan been dating?” he asked, covering his mouth with one hand to keep his words from reaching other ears. Haru hated it when people did that – all they were doing was highlighting the fact they were talking for just one person. Well, Makoto and Rei didn’t notice anyway, so he supposed it didn’t matter. 

“A week,” he said, not bothering to keep his voice any quieter than normal. 

Nagisa wriggled excitedly. “So, have you taken him on a date yet?” 

Haru quirked an eyebrow up. “No?”

“EHH?”

So much for Nagisa trying to be subtle. 

It wasn’t only Makoto and Rei who glanced over at that point, but the entire student body who were on the roof for lunch. Haru rolled his eyes, and attempted to carry on with his meal, but his arm was grabbed and his body jerked upwards. A moment later, he was being dragged back into the building and pushed towards a quiet corner of the stairwell. Haru frowned down at his half-spilt lunch and swore Nagisa would regret that at some point. 

“You need to take him on a date, Haru-chan!” Nagisa whined, pulling at Haru’s sleeve. 

Haru didn’t understand the appeal of dates. Sure, he’d briefly thought about them, but eventually decided that they weren’t necessary for him and Makoto – they did everything together anyway, going out together would be a normal occurrence, not something worthy of being labelled as a ‘date’. Besides, from what little he knew about dates from movies and such, Haru felt they were all boring and sort of ridiculous. He would much rather talk to Makoto then sit and stare at a cinema screen with him. He’d rather just cook a meal for them in the comfort of his own home than go out and buy extortionate prices for sub-average food. Even if club or bar dates were an option, Haru despised the very idea of those places. Dates just seemed… pointless. Or at least, in his and Makoto’s relationship they were. 

Judging from the disapproval on Nagisa’s face, he’d already guessed what Haru was thinking. “Haru-chan!” he sighed, snatching Haru’s lunch box to try and gain his undivided attention. He just succeeded in making Haru more irritated. “ _You_ may think dates are boring, but I bet Mako-chan doesn’t! He’d probably love to spend some quality time with you.”

“We’re always together anyway,” Haru pointed out.

“Yes, but dates aren’t the same as just hanging out. Dates have the pre-planned romantic aspect. You’re hanging out as a couple, not just friends!”

Haru didn’t see why he and Makoto couldn’t be both. He was dating his best friend; that was sort of the whole point.

“Why don’t you just do it for Mako-chan? It’s worth making the effort for him, right?” 

Haru’s eye twitched. The shit-eating grin on Nagisa’s face proved that Nagisa knew that he was hitting Haru where it hurt. As much as Haru hated to admit it… Nagisa had a point: Makoto probably was more inclined to enjoy the normal relationship stuff than Haru. Dates were a part of that… 

The bell rang, calling the end of lunch, and Haru was too lost in thought to even complain that he hadn’t been able to finish eating yet. Nagisa hummed innocently and proudly,  
knowing fine well that he’d succeeded in his talk, and said something about getting Rei before skipping off. Immediately, a hand touched Haru’s shoulder. 

Makoto smiled at him. “Ready to go, Haru?”

“Yeah.”

They didn’t rush in their wander back to class – the steady stream of students returning to their classrooms pushed them along the corridors at a pleasant speed, and because of the business, they had an excuse to walk shoulder to shoulder. Makoto told Haru about what he and Rei had been discussing, but Haru couldn’t follow much of it (even if he had been paying complete attention, he’d never been that good at literature). 

It isn’t until they’re taking their seats in class that Haru finally asks the question. 

“Do you want to go on dates?”

Makoto froze, holding his text book half open. Confusion and surprise are written all over his face until his eyebrows raise as something clicks in his head. He laughed, shoulders shaking as he tried to keep the noise to a minimum. 

“Ah, so _that’s_ what Nagisa was whispering to you about.”

Haru frowned, unsatisfied with the response. “Do you?”

“As long as I’m spending time with you, I don’t really mind what we label it as,” Makoto shrugged, propping his head on his arm and smiling at Haru. “If you wanted to, we can.”

 _It’s not about what I want,_ Haru said through a roll of his eyes. Makoto chuckled and started to pull out some pens for the lesson. Haru watched him for a moment.

“Tomorrow,” he said. Makoto glanced up. “Let’s go on a date tomorrow.”

Makoto seemed surprised, but nodded. “Ok then. What do you want to do?”

Haru hadn’t thought of that…

Slightly flustered, he searched through every movie or book he’d ever read to try and find a decent idea for what they could do. He knew that he wanted to be the one to plan it – he’d suggested going, so it fell to him to do the organising – that he didn’t exactly know what to plan. Knowing he didn’t have much time before the teacher walked in, Haru shook his head and waved Makoto’s question off. 

“It’s a surprise.”

Makoto definitely knew that was code for ‘I haven’t decided yet, so don’t ask’, but he smiled and said “Ok. I look forward to it!”

Haru may or may not have spent the entire remainder of the school day noting possible ideas down in the back of his workbook, but whatever he did, he still had no clue by the time the bell rang for the end of school.


	16. Makoto - Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Makoto had thought the whole idea was bizarre when Haru had suggested it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember when this was a 500 word drabble? Ha. Ha. 
> 
> I'm still up for writing anything you guys want to see ^^
> 
> Tumblr: [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com)

Makoto had thought the whole idea was bizarre when Haru had suggested it; dates hardly seemed necessary when they spent everyday together anyway. But, it seemed whatever Nagisa had said had really gotten to Haru, so Makoto agreed to go ahead with whatever Haru planned. He quickly ran a hand through his hair a few times, making sure he didn’t have any bits sticking up (he shouldn’t have agreed to play hairdressers with the twins the same day as the date), and scanned his outfit again. He wouldn’t usually think about his clothes much, but since Haru had texted him to ‘dress nice’ that very morning, Makoto had put a little more effort into dressing today. Skinny jeans, a shirt over a tee, and a scarf seemed nice enough, right?

“Makoto! Haru’s here!” his mother called from downstairs. 

Glancing at his watch, he realised it was already time for Haru to pick him up – actually, Haru was here on the dot. 3pm exactly. Makoto had assumed he would have had to go pull him out of the bath. Haru must have been really serious about this date. 

He quickly shoved his wallet and keys into his pockets – no phone today, he’d already decided he wanted no distractions from Haru – and hurried downstairs so Haru didn’t have to wait. He was halfway down the staircase when he spotted Haru standing waiting at the door. 

He froze. 

Haru was wearing black jeans, a black shirt (that was actually ironed??), and a blue tie. 

_A tie._

Makoto’s eyes drifted down to what Haru held in his hands, and suddenly became aware why his mother was standing there with her arms crossed and a questioning look on her face. 

Haru looked up and held out the flowers. “Makoto.” 

“H-hi Haru…” Makoto forced his legs to take him down the last few stares. “Are these for me?”

Haru just nodded – a blush rising to his cheeks. 

Glancing to his side, Makoto realised his mother was holding back a smirk. She met his eyes and tilted her head to the side, he knew fine well that was the _‘Something you’re not telling me?’_ look. 

Haru pushed the flowers a little closer to Makoto, so he took them sheepishly. It was just a little collection of wildflowers, and Makoto decided they were a very Haru type bouquet. Embarrassed, he gave his mother another side glance. She sighed and reached out to take the flowers from him. 

“I’ll put these in a vase. Have a nice time, you two. Make sure you’re not back late, Makoto.” She turned after giving Makoto one last look (this one was a _‘be back in time for you to explain, young man’_ look). 

Makoto turned back to Haru and ran a hand through his hair in disbelief. “Y-you… thank you. You look great.”

Haru just nodded. He seemed uncomfortable. 

“I suddenly feel really under-dressed…” Makoto laughed, hoping it would lighten the mood. 

Haru shook his head. “You look fine,” His eyes trailed up and down Makoto briefly before giving another nod that seemed to say _‘More than fine’_. “Let’s go.”

The walk through Iwatobi was pretty silent; Haru seemed to be pre-occupied with something in his head, and Makoto kept casting him side-glances – he was finding it hard to believe that Haru, _his Haru_ , was beside him in a _shirt and tie_. And this wasn't just the school uniform shirt and tie. He was in it by choice. And it made all the difference. At some point, Haru caught him looking and pouted at the attention; he caught Makoto’s hand as Makoto started chuckling at the reaction. 

The first stop was the local cinema. Well, it could hardly be called a cinema; it was a tiny building with only two ‘screens’ that consisted of maybe ten or twenty seats and a rather pitifully sized cinema screen. On the odd occasion that Makoto and Haru went to the cinema, they tended to head into the city – but this one was quieter, and that was probably why Haru had picked it. Haru stepped up to the counter and paid for two tickets to the soppy romance that was playing. Makoto was too shocked to object (Haru and romance movies never mixed, never mind Haru and cinemas), and they stepped into the empty screening room and took their seats in the very back.

“How much do I owe you for the ticket?” Makoto asked, fishing out his wallet. 

Haru glared and Makoto knew he’d said something wrong. 

“Nothing.”

“But I should pay at least half, Haru.”

“No.”

Haru was so adamant that he wasn’t taking any money of Makoto, that Makoto had no choice to give in. He’d find a way to repay Haru later.

The movie was awful. It was a predictable plot with unrealistic characters and the romance was so sickly Makoto found himself cringing more times than he could count – and he was the one who _liked_ romances. Haru fidgeted the whole way through, like he was trying to do something but never managed it. When the credits rolled, they both left the cinema unsatisfied. 

Next was dinner, and Makoto was starting to get the impression that Haru had tried his best to pick the very traditional date plans. It was sweet that he’d gone to the trouble, but these plans just didn’t seem to suit Haru at all, and when Haru led Makoto to one of the most expensive hotel restaurants around, Makoto was all ready to tell Haru to cut it out. 

He couldn’t though; Haru looked so determined as he took Makoto’s hand and led him inside, that Makoto just smiled and went along with it. 

They were sat in a corner of the restaurant (thankfully, as Makoto was definitely started to feel under-dressed now), and a waiter gave them menus. 

“Can I get you any drinks?” he asked, pulling out a notepad. 

Haru’s eyes widened, and he looked at Makoto in a panic. “We’re too young.”

Makoto blinked. “Huh?”

“We’re too young to order wine.” Haru was whispering like it was the most horrific realisation in the world. 

The waiter looked as confused as Makoto did. “Well… yeah…” He didn’t quite see the problem. 

Haru’s face fell even further when he realised Makoto wasn’t following. “Then… what…?”

Ah.

Turning to the waiter with a smile, Makoto ordered a simple jug of water to share, and the waiter vanished. Once alone, Makoto gave Haru a reassuring smile. “Haru, you don’t even like wine.”

“But… that’s what you’re meant to drink…” Haru glared at the table. 

“Haru, listen!” He reached across and grabbed Haru’s hand. “Stop trying to make this a ‘normal’ date. Just because it’s stereotypical, doesn’t mean it’s something we have to do.”

Haru looked horrified. “But Nagisa said–”

“Since when did you listen to Nagisa?” Makoto laughed and tightened his hold on Haru’s hand. “Haru, everyone’s different, and every couple’s different. Even if you want to go on dates, next time let’s go on one that suits us, yeah?”

He could see the cogs in Haru’s head turning, trying to work out where he’d gone wrong and how he was supposed to fix it. Eventually Haru looked back up, eyes shimmering. “Can we go to the aquarium?”

Makoto grinned. “There’s a more us-like date!” 

After that, Haru seemed much happier – like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders – and the two of them could actually relax enough to enjoy their meal. Though, they enjoyed the bill less so. Who knew two main meals would cost so much? This time, when Haru insisted that he would pay the whole thing, Makoto wouldn’t have any of it. They wandered back along the beach hand in hand, talking about possible dates that they would both actually enjoy. Haru loosened his tie as they neared their street, and Makoto immediately decided he _really_ hoped Haru would wear ties on all their dates. 

As they reached the steps where they had to part, Haru shuffled his feet uncertainly. “Do you want to come over?”

Makoto really did. He _really_ did. But he also knew after Haru’s flower gift earlier that his parents wouldn’t be happy if he came back late. Haru noticed the disappointment in his eyes before Makoto even spoke. 

“Tomorrow?” he asked instead, hopeful. 

“Tomorrow,” Makoto agreed, squeezing his hand before letting go and reaching for his keys. He took the last few steps towards his front door and pushed the key in. 

A hand caught his arm and spun him back round. Haru tugged him down and pressed their lips together. It only took Makoto a moment to get over his surprise, before he was wrapping his arms around Haru and melting into the kiss. He didn’t think he’d ever get used to this: this amazing warmth when his lips were moving against Haru’s. He’d kiss Haru forever if he could. 

Haru’s arms hooked around his neck, like he was never planning to let go, and Makoto was flooded with a heat that seemed dangerous. His fingers dug into Haru’s waist briefly, and he forced himself to break away from the kiss. He gasped as Haru chased after him – catching his lower lip between his teeth before Makoto finally escaped. He pressed their foreheads together and sighed. 

“Haru… don’t do that now…”

“Why?” 

There was a mischievous glint in Haru’s eyes, but Makoto wasn’t in a mischievous mood, not when his body felt like it was on fire. “Because,” he breathed, voice low. “I’ll not want to stop.”

Haru just cocked an eyebrow and gave an unimpressed snort. 

They both leant in for one last chaste kiss. 

“Tomorrow,” Haru muttered against Makoto’s lips just before they released each other. 

Makoto smiled. “Tomorrow.”

With a nod, Haru turned and started hurrying up the steps to his house. Makoto watched him go and pulled the scarf from around his neck – feeling much too hot to wear it. He turned and unlocked the front door and stepped inside. 

His mother was standing right there.

“Makoto…” she said with a cautious tone and a smile. 

Makoto figured he wouldn't be heading to bed any time soon.


	17. Haru - Blankets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So Haru threw the pillow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have a mighty need for blanket forts...

After the somewhat disastrous date yesterday, Haru was looking forward to just relaxing with Makoto – no worrying over plans or dinners or movies or what kind of flowers to buy. He let himself sleep in late, and took an even longer bath than normal; Makoto’s texts came throughout the morning telling him that he wasn’t sure how long it would be until he could come over, but it’s not like it would have mattered if Makoto turned up while Haru was still in the bath – actually, that was pretty much an everyday occurrence. 

By the time lunch came and went however, Haru was starting to get impatient. He started finding odd jobs to do around the house: cleaning the grill, washing his bedsheets, hovering. 

Finally, he heard the doorbell as he was pulling spare bedding out of the cupboard. He listened as the door opened and Makoto’s voice called into the house. “Haru? It’s me!”

“In here,” Haru called back, still searching through sheets and towels to find some pillow cases. Footsteps approached, and he turned to see Makoto in the doorway. He immediately tossed the pile of sheets at him. 

Makoto’s laughed as he was hit by the load and tried to catch as many as he could in his arms. “I’m sorry! My parents were lecturing me.”

Haru lifted an eyebrow as he bent to pick the sheets Makoto hadn’t caught. He slipped past his boyfriend and out into the hall, Makoto following as he explained. “Well, when you turn up to ours with a tie and flowers, they sort of put two and two together.”

Ah, so the Tachibanas knew about their relationship. Haru hummed and started heading up the stairs. 

“I don’t think they were surprised… just amused,” Makoto grumbled. “They kept making jokes. It was awful.”

“So what was the lecture?” Haru asked as they reached his bedroom. He dumped the sheets on the floor and motioned for Makoto to do the same. Then he moved to haul the undressed duvet and pillows from the mattress. 

He paused when he realised Makoto had suddenly gone quiet. Looking back up, he saw Makoto twiddling his thumbs and blushing. When Makoto’s glance drifted to the bed, Haru got the message. 

“Oh…” he muttered, suddenly feeling embarrassed himself and paying a lot of attention to pull loose feathers out of the pillow he was holding. 

Makoto forced a laugh. “Y-yeah… I don’t think I’m allowed to sleep over for a while…”

The silence that fell was uncomfortable. 

So Haru threw the pillow. 

Which hit Makoto square in the face. 

The pillow dropped to the floor with a soft thud, and Makoto and Haru just stared at one another for a moment. 

“Haru…” Makoto said slowly. “What was that?”

They watched each other carefully. For once, their ability to read each other became a flaw, as they both knew that they were reaching for a pillow at the same time. 

And hell broke loose. 

By the time the pillow fight was over, they’d passed through every room in the house, managed to soak Makoto to the bone, and fallen in a heap on Haru’s bed. It took one brief look for them to agree to surrender and move onto their next task. 

Haru’s bedroom was transformed in about half an hour; they’d dragged in some of the dining table chairs and strung as many blankets as Haru could find across the room, piled every pillow in existence on the ground, and dragged in Haru’s laptop. They’d made blanket forts before, but always with the twins, who just wanted to hang a blanket from two sofas and call it a day; Makoto and Haru had made complete use of their teenager-selves and created a blanket fort fit for a king. 

The two of them curled up beneath the ceiling of sheets as Makoto started scrolling through Netflix for a film. He’d pause on any he thought Haru would enjoy, and waited for a hum to tell him ‘ok’ or to move on. When they finally passed one Haru didn’t mind watching, he reached out and clicked on it himself, nudging Makoto’s side to make him lean back so he could lie against him. Makoto snaked an arm around Haru’s back, settling down against the warmth. They actually paid attention for the first half of the film, muttering only the odd comment here and there, but Haru started to lose interest, and Makoto noticed it immediately. 

“My parents will probably tell yours, you know,” Makoto murmured – he was pressing half of his face into Haru’s hair, stroking his thumb up and down his arm.

“They won’t care much.”

“No?”

“Probably not. They’ll trust your parents to keep an eye on us.”

Makoto laughed lightly and started stretching out his foot to close the laptop screen. Once he’d succeeded, he pushed it as far out of their reach as possible, and shuffled down to lie fully on the pillowed floor. Haru got the message and shuffled with him, lying down face-to-face. It was pleasant; the closeness in their little blanket world. They didn’t need to say anything, so Makoto just continued stroking Haru’s arm lightly. Unsatisfied with the distance, Haru rolled closer still and drew Makoto in for a short kiss. 

“What time is it?” Makoto asked when they pulled apart. 

Haru grimaced as he rolled over. He poked his hand out the side of the blanket fort, feeling around for the phone he thought he’d left there. Eventually, he’d grabbed it and glanced at the time before pushing it back out there. He rolled back to Makoto and gave a huff. “Four.”

Makoto grumbled something unintelligible. “I’ll have to head home for dinner in an hour.”

“No.”

“Yes. My parents are keeping track of me now, remember?” Haru wasn’t ok with that, and frowned deep enough so Makoto knew it. Makoto just laughed and kissed him again. “Sorry… but we’ll see each other at school tomorrow, anyway.”

Haru was starting to think he was in too deep with Makoto; he didn’t feel pacified when told he’d see him tomorrow, he wanted to see Makoto _all the time_. He never wanted to be apart from him. Of course, he was well aware that was a childish thought; even a couple as close as they were couldn’t be together every second of every day (no matter how pleasant the idea was). 

“Haru?”

With a pout, Haru reached up and pulled at the blanket hanging over them. With just that movement, the entire fort came collapsing on top of them. Makoto gave a yelp of shock, and Haru took the change to capture him in one of the sheets; tangling it around him and promptly collapsing on top of the white lump that had once been his boyfriend. Makoto fought against the hold, his shouts of complaints broken with laughter as he flailed around to try and get a decent hold on Haru. He managed it eventually, snatching him and rolling the two of them over so Haru was now covered in blankets and Makoto lay free on top of him. Haru protested, kicking Makoto’s leg lightly. With another laugh, Makoto started pulling down the sheet from around Haru’s face until they could see each other again. 

Makoto’s lips burst into a grin. “Got you.”

After that, Makoto was at least ten minutes late for dinner.


	18. Makoto - Blankets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Last time we shared a bed was the moment I realised I loved you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I'll _probably_ end this fic in a few more chapters... but I'm still deciding whether to smut or not... thoughts and preferences? 
> 
> My tumblr is [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com) ^^

It had taken a predictably long time for Makoto to get his parents to agree to let Haru sleepover. The conversation had mainly involved his parents repetitively saying they were happy for Haru to come over, as long as he slept on the sofa, and then quickly trying to think up another option, because they were both too nice to force Haru to sleep there. Makoto wasn’t even involved in the conversation for most of it; his parents just argued with themselves, until they finally made Makoto swear that no ‘funny business’ would go on and the bedroom door must remain unlocked. 

Makoto didn’t point out that there was no way any funny business would go on anyway, not when he was under the same roof as his parents and two siblings who didn’t understand the concept of personal space. Besides, he and Haru still hadn’t exactly talked about what came after kissing in a relationship. Sure, Makoto had thought about it – what healthy teenage boy didn’t? – but he hardly felt he and Haru were ready for that sort of thing. Haru didn’t seem like he was interested at all, actually (though, Makoto had thought Haru wasn’t interested in love at all and… well… he was certainly proven wrong there). 

He rang Haru with the news that he could stay over, and also mentioned the rules his parents had put in place – Makoto thought he heard a snort of amusement, and Haru asked “Aren’t the twins there?”, so he had obviously been thinking the same thing. 

Haru came round in time to join the family meal: hot pot, which his mother had made specially. Makoto knew his parents were sending them looks over the meal, but he ignored them, and Haru was thankfully too engrossed in the meal and the twins stories about school to notice them at all. As the twins were ushered off to do their homework and Makoto started helping his mother clear away the dishes (Haru had been ordered to sit back down when he tried to help too), the air was lined with a nervous tension. 

“So, Haru…” The moment his father spoke, Makoto’s stomach lurched. He turned to frown, but his father waved him away and continued. “You and Makoto are dating now, correct?”

Makoto’s eyes drifted over to Haru, searching his face for any sign of discomfort. Instead, Haru seemed perfectly relaxed. “Yes.”

“Can’t say we didn’t see that one coming,” Makoto’s father chuckled, opening up his paper to start reading. 

“Erm, I do recall you were the one saying that Makoto seemed too much of a ladies man when _I_ mentioned the boys might get together,” his mother quickly intervened, spinning around and shooting a look at her husband. 

“Well, yes, but I still agreed that Makoto and Haru were likely to get together at some point.”

“Don’t try and take credit for my deductions!” 

Makoto took the chance to speed-wash the rest of the dishes and grabbed Haru’s wrists to drag him up to their room. They didn’t get far: they were intercepted on the landing by the twins who then forced them to help them with their homework. Once the homework was completed, it quickly turned into the usual gaming battles on Makoto’s console; Ran claimed Haru today, and Ren stuck with Makoto, and the night seemed to flitter away with sibling rivalry and boyfriend backstabbing during Mario Kart. 

Once the twins had been sent off to bed, Haru headed for a bath and Makoto started battling the next gym leader on Pokémon X. They switched once Haru got out – and, naturally, it was Haru who eventually beat the gym leader, since (to quote Haru) “Makoto sucks”. They sat huddled together on the bed battling each other (Haru borrowed Ren’s 3DS and game) for a good hour or so; the conversation consisting of nothing but muttered curses at one another, and the odd “If you loved me, you wouldn’t use mega evolution”. Makoto’s father popped his head round the door at some point and reminded them about the no-lock rule and wished them goodnight. 

“Want me to get the futon out, Haru?” Makoto asked as the turned the consoles off and placed them on the desk. 

Haru glanced up at him. “Your parents didn’t say anything about a no-sharing-the-bed rule.”

Makoto had to try his very best to hide a pleased smile and the two clambered under the blankets together. They took up their usual positions – Haru next to the wall, and Makoto at the outer edge – but after a brief silent exchange, both shuffled closer. Makoto thre his arm around Haru’s back and savoured in the feeling of his warmth against his chest. Haru’s breath was light and pleasant against his collarbone, and he pressed a brief kiss there before curling up – he always got sleepy after an evening bath. 

“You know…” Makoto whispered into the dark as he listened to their hearts beating. “Last time we shared a bed was the moment I realised I loved you.”

Haru moved, pulling away from Makoto just enough for their eyes to meet. Makoto felt a blush rising to his cheeks at the confession, and Haru quirked an eyebrow. “What took you so long?”

“Oh?” Makoto chuckled. “And when did you realise, Haru? The day we met?”

Haru sighed, and Makoto could see what he was thinking. _‘If only’._

If only, indeed.

Makoto pushed his lips against Haru’s and sighed happily into the kiss. It was short and sweet, and neither of them felt too bad when they broke apart, since they just cuddled up against one another again. Haru fitted perfectly inside Makoto’s arms, and Makoto wanted to just lay like this forever. He let his eyelids drop shut, humming contently as his body started to relax against the mattress. Usually it took some tossing and turning before he could feel comfortable; maybe ‘cuddling with Haru’ was always meant to be his default sleeping position. 

“Makoto?” Haru murmured – his face cradled against Makoto’s chest. Makoto just hummed. “That thing… your parents are scared of…”

Makoto opened his eyes again and peered down at the top of Haru’s head. He hadn’t expected Haru to bring that up. “Yeah?”

“Do… Is that something… you think about?”

Seeing how small Haru was trying to make himself, Makoto started playing with his hair to try and reassure him. “Well… yeah. But it’s not something we need to think about together yet,” He didn’t like not being able to see Haru’s face at times like these. “Or did you want to think about it?”

Haru just shrugged. 

Makoto kissed the top of his head and let his eyes fall shut again. “Well, for now, we can just cuddle. That alright?”

“Yeah.”

Makoto smiled and tugged the blanket tighter around them. They both fell asleep sooner or later, and didn’t move an inch out of each other’s embrace the entire night.


	19. Haru - Water

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You’ve pulled a muscle.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRYYYYY. I missed yesterday's update partly because I had to read a ~~supremely boring~~ book for class, and then may or may not have gotten distracted by the GoT episode release... yeah... 
> 
> In terms of the smut thing, I've figured if I do write it for this story, I'll post it as a different work in the same series. That way those who don't want to read it don't have to :) There'll be no smut in this particular work, so don't worry if you want to avoid it ^^
> 
> I'm also afraid the next chapter will be the last. 20 seems like a good place to end. Thanks everyone for reading :)

Haru clicked the stopwatch as Makoto burst out of the water with a gasp; feet slapping to the floor of the pool and chest heaving as he caught his breath. He yanked his goggles off his head and ran a hand through his hair to remove the excess water before it dripped down into his eyes. Haru was crouching at the end of the pool, timing his freestyle laps, and for once not too upset about not being the one in the water – water looked just as good rolling down Makoto’s skin. 

Makoto looked up at him, and Haru’s world shook at the burst of green that entered his vision. Rubbing a hand across his neck, Makoto cocked an eyebrow. “Well?”

Haru read the numbers of the watch to himself, and met Makoto’s gaze with a small frown. “It would have been good, if not for that last turn.”

With a groan, Makoto rolled his neck, he closed his eyes in concentration as he rubbed at invisible spots across his shoulders. "Yeah… I turned all weird. I knew it felt odd.”

“Makoto.”

“Hm?”

“You’ve pulled a muscle.”

Makoto’s eyes snapped open, face immediately turning to embarrassment. “It’s not… pulled.”

“Strained, then.”

“It’s not that bad, Haru, I promise. I just turned funny.”

“It hurts.”

“It’s ok, I pro–” Makoto cut off when he realised Haru’s expression wasn’t easing at all. He gave in and gave a dejected nod. 

Of course Haru had noticed when Makoto stained one of his shoulder muscles. Haru could read Makoto like a book (even clearer since they started dating), and his eyes was always sharper at things in the water. Pushing on his knees to stand up, Haru glared down at Makoto – unimpressed that he’d continued to swim the rest of the lap even though he must have felt a twinge in his muscle. He was putting unnecessary pressure on himself, and all because of this stupid wish to race Haru in freestyle. Haru didn’t mind racing Makoto – even if he was slightly confused about Makoto’s aims – but he wasn’t ok with Makoto hurting himself for it. 

He held a hand out, like Makoto always did for him, and waited. 

Makoto’s eyes widened when he saw the gesture, and though he looked quite meek, he smiled gratefully as he took Haru’s hand and let him pull him up out of the pool. 

Keeping his hand locked with Makoto’s, Haru turned to Kou, who was currently working on Rei and Nagisa’s form, and called out, “We’re done.”

Every single mouth of every single team member dropped open – Makoto’s included. 

“Y-you’re finishing early, Haruka-senpai?” Kou asked, voice nearly a whisper with horror. 

Haru didn’t feel like expanding and just nodded. He dragged Makoto back to the changing room, ignoring the gossiping whispers that started behind him. Once inside with the door shut, Haru dropped Makoto’s hand and realised his boyfriend looked guilty. 

“Sorry Haru…” Makoto said. “You don’t have to leave just because of–”

“Dry off and sit down,” Haru ordered – Makoto was thinking silly things again, so he hoped to stop them before they escalated. Makoto got the message thankfully, and both boys patted themselves down quickly. Makoto then hesitantly sat on the bench in the middle of the room, watching with worried eyes as Haru wandered behind Makoto and knelt on the bench. 

Makoto gave a squeak of shock when Haru first put his hands on his shoulders. Haru sighed. “We need to relax the muscle before it gets worse,” he said, confused as to why Makoto hadn’t realised that’s what he was doing. “Ok?”

Makoto nodded slowly, and folded his hands in his lap, sitting perfectly still for Haru. Pleased with the obedience, Haru started massaging. 

He wasn’t a professional, but he at least knew the basics from when teachers had helped him with pulled muscles in the past. Besides, Makoto’s muscles were so _prominent_ on his back, Haru assumed finding the pulled one would be pretty easy. His hands moved unsurely at first, and he kept asking Makoto whether he was at the right spot – exploring the muscles all along his upper back and shoulders, and even the ones and the bottom of his neck. The muscle causing the issue seemed to be just below the curve of the left shoulder, so Haru started focusing his movements there. 

It was almost therapeutic for _Haru_ ; pushing and massaging the soft skin along Makoto’s back so repetitively was… strangely relaxing. He found he didn’t need to think too hard about what he was doing; he knew what every subtle movement meant from Makoto, so he could tell if he was pressing too hard or not enough. He also knew the exact moment that Makoto himself finally started to relax; he sighed softly and leant back into Haru’s fingers as he rubbed circles into the skin. When Haru dared to lean a little to the side, he noticed Makoto’s eyes were closed and his mouth hung open ever so slightly in contentment. Haru could’ve done this forever. 

He couldn’t though, and Makoto realised that too and gave another happy sigh before he turned to glance over his shoulder. “Thank you, Haru. I really needed that.”

Haru didn’t voice the fact he didn’t want to stop, since he knew it had to be nearing the time the others would finish, so he let his hands slowly drift down and off Makoto’s back. Before Makoto stood though, he leant forward and kissed the muscle that had been the problem. 

“Haru?” Makoto asked softly when Haru moved away again. 

“It’s all healed now,” Haru said as he wandered back over to his locker and got out his towel again to head into the shower. When he turned around, Makoto was still sitting on the bench, smiling softly as he stared at Haru. Haru frowned. “What?”

“Thank you.”

Haru averted his gaze. “You already said that.”

He didn’t look back up when Makoto stood, or when he stepped over to him. He didn’t even turn when he stood _right there_ and stared down at him. It was only when Makoto put a hand on his cheek and lightly turned his head that Haru looked at him again. He didn’t look for long, as Makoto kissed him softly. 

“Thank you,” he whispered again before letting go.


	20. Makoto - Water

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Right then though, they were happy.

The blackness of the ocean sparkled, mirroring the moonless sky overhead – the stars taking their chance to light the night sky. The sand beneath Makoto’s body was soft, softer than what usually made up the beach; it wasn’t grainy, but smooth, cradling him like a blanket. He could have lain there forever: warm, content, so relaxed he could have drifted off into a dream within a dream. But the lapping waves were soon joined by an alien noise. 

_Buzz. Buzz._

Makoto felt the vibration as much as he heard it – soft and annoying right beside his face. It was an unpleasant companion in this quiet bliss, but as it continued to persist, he knew he’d have to let it haul him out of this moment and back into the waking world. 

Luckily, the waking world consisted of a beautifully warm bed, and the covers arranged in just the _perfect_ way to maximise comfort. Of course, Makoto would have to disturb this perfection by reaching out for the phone that had been left on his pillow beside him (he and Haru really needed to stop falling asleep on the phone together, it was going to hurt when their phone bills came through). 

He groaned as turned the phone to face him – the light burned, as he should have expected – and blinked a few times to see what was causing the buzzing. It was the weekend, so it wasn’t his alarm…

… Not that his alarm would go off at 2am, which is apparently what it was. 

It took some time before Makoto realised that the buzzing was caused by someone calling him, and it took even longer before he could read the name at the top of the screen. 

‘Haru’

About a million different emotions shot through Makoto at that point. Primarily joy (a feeling that always came with contact with Haru), irritation (seriously, 2am), and then complete terror. Why was Haru calling him now? There must be an emergency. 

His voice shook as he pressed the green button and lifted the phone to his ear. “Haru?”

_“Sorry.”_

Makoto sat up – flinching a little at the cold in the air compared to beneath his duvet. He felt groggy, and didn’t understand. “Eh? Sorry for what?”

_“You were having a good dream. I woke you. Sorry.”_

Makoto had to laugh at that: was it unhealthy that Haru knew him so well he could pick up whether he’d been having a good dream just from his voice? Rubbing his eyes, he sighed. “I don’t mind if it’s you, Haru. What’s up?”

_“I need to show you something.”_

“Now?”

_“Please?”_

Unable to ever say no to Haru, Makoto pushed himself out of bed to search for a pair of trousers. “Give me a moment, I’ll be at yours soon.”

_“No need. I’m waiting outside.”_

“Eh! Haru!”

Haru hung up before he even heard Makoto’s complaints, but the knowledge that his boyfriend was standing outside in the cold night – for god knows how long – only made Makoto move faster. He tripped up in the efforts to pull his jeans on, but somehow managed to head downstairs and grab a coat and shoes on the way out. 

As promised, Haru was leaning on the gate. He looked up as Makoto stepped out – thankfully the night air wasn’t too cold this time of year, but it was hardly warm enough to be out in just loose trousers and a t-shirt, which is what Haru was wearing. Makoto frowned at the sight, and immediately pulled off his coat and wrapped it around Haru’s shoulders. He’d been wearing a long sleeved shirt to bed, he wouldn’t be too bad. 

Haru, however, seemed to disagree. “I’m not cold, you are.”

“You aren’t showing me anything unless you wear that,” Makoto said stubbornly. 

Haru must have _really_ wanted Makoto to see whatever this was, as he didn’t even try to argue back after that. He just took Makoto’s hand and started walking. 

They didn’t speak, just walked hand-in-hand in their usual comforting silence. It probably had something to do with the fact Makoto was still a little sleepy, and Haru no doubt sensed that, but even if they had both been fully awake, they had both discovered that these quiet moments were something to truly treasure. They didn’t really need any words passing between them. 

Makoto had no clue where Haru had been taking him, but he certainly didn’t expect to end up standing in front of the school gates – closed and locked for the night. 

“Haru?” Makoto asked, but Haru’s hand was already gone and he was starting to climb over the gate. “Haru! We can’t!”

Of course, Haru didn’t say anything – he just jumped down inside the school grounds and peered back through to beckon Makoto. “Hurry.”

With a whimper, Makoto started scaling the gate too. Haru looked pleased when he finally joined him on the other side, and Makoto sighed, now resigned to the fact that trespassing was becoming a more regular occurrence for him. Haru snatched up his hand once more, and they headed off. It didn’t take long for Makoto to work out which direction they were going: towards the swimming pool. What he couldn’t work out was _why_. He and Haru were here nearly every day, what could Haru possibly have to show him now? He wasn’t very surprised when they reached the changing room and Haru pulled a key out of his pocket. 

Then, after shutting the door, Haru started tugging off his clothes. 

“H-Haru!” Makoto exclaimed. 

Haru just ignored him, and was soon stripped down to – naturally – his jammers. Haru turned to him expectantly. “Strip.”

“Haru I’m not wearing anything to swim in!”

“Underwear’s fine.”

“It’s really not…”

“It’s important.”

At those words, Makoto couldn’t argue back. He started tugging off his clothes, tossing them onto the bench haphazardly like Haru had, and was left feeling more than a little ridiculous in his boxers. Haru nodded, seemingly in approval, and then started to go out to the poolside. 

In nothing but boxers, the night was chilly, and Makoto didn’t much like that. He watched Haru approach the very edge of the pool, curling his toes over the edge and staring down into the perfectly still water – like it was completely frozen. (Makoto mentally chastised himself for thinking of it as ‘frozen’…).

“Look,” Haru said softly, reaching out to Makoto behind him. 

Tentatively, Makoto moved forward, lacing his fingers with Haru and stepping up beside him. He stared out, trying to see what Haru thought was so very important, and for a split second, Makoto thought he was back in his dream. 

The water, nearly black, was like the sky itself. The stars reflected, a scattering of light freckling the smooth surface. It was beautiful, no doubt about it, and he sighed happily at the sight. 

“It’s amazing, Haru,” Makoto murmured, deciding not to voice his question as to why Haru couldn’t have just down him the ocean – on a night as clear and quiet as this, the sea would have shown the exact same effect, just like it had in Makoto’s dream. But, whatever Haru’s thought process was, there was obviously a reason behind it all. It started to become a little clearly when Haru lowered himself down – slipping his fingers out of Makoto’s – and dropped into the water. 

“Haru!” Makoto gasped as his boyfriend resurfaced. “You’ll get sick, come out!”

Haru looked up at him and rested his arms on the side, right in front of Makoto’s toes. “Come in.”

“No!”

“Please?”

With yet another sigh, Makoto gave in and lowered himself in slowly – flinching as the cold water consumed him. Frozen indeed. He stood opposite Haru, pouting and starting to shiver. “Now what?”

Haru’s arms wrapped around his shoulders, and he pulled himself up to meet Makoto’s lips. It wasn’t expected, but after a brief moment of confusion, Makoto noticed how _warm_ Haru’s skin was compared to the water, and wrapped his arms around Haru’s back – hugging him tight into his chest. He could taste the chlorine on Haru’s lips, but it was such a normal taste that it felt almost comfortingly familiar even when it mixed into the kiss. 

When Haru pulled back, he stayed close and stared into Makoto’s eyes – Makoto had a nasty feeling he had a stupid dopey expression on his face, since he always seemed to feel nearly drugged when he got to kiss Haru. Haru seemed happy with whatever he saw though, and pressed his face against Makoto’s shoulder. 

“I first realised it in the bath.”

Makoto gave a hum of question, slowly moving so he could lean against the edge of the pool – Haru still held up against him. 

“That I loved you. I realised it in the bath,” Haru expanded. 

Makoto chuckled. “That’s very you.”

“The bath would have been cramped. So I wanted to tell you here. It wasn’t the bath that was the important part anyway, it was the water.”

“You brought me here just to tell me that?”

Haru nodded against him. “When you told me, it felt good. So I wanted to do it too.” Then Haru pulled back, arms still tight around Makoto’s neck as his eyes searched for Makoto’s reaction. 

His answer was another kiss. 

Haru sighed against Makoto’s lips, in relief it seemed like. “Yeah. It does feel good, Haru. Thank you,” Makoto whispered against him.

The two stayed like that for a little while – just clinging to one another, forehead against forehead, and saying a million things through their eyes that most wouldn’t be able to say with words. After some time, the let go, only to drift in the water, hands clasped to keep them near, and stared up at the sky like they were floating in space. Sooner or later, they would have to leave; the cold would finally catch up with them, and they would have to scarper before morning. Right then though, they were happy. And it was during the silence together that they realised this strange connection, this devotion and love, it wasn’t something that could ever fade. Love was often compared to stars, but to them, stars were flimsy things that would eventually burn out. Stars were beautiful, but too short-lived to be compared to their love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a cheesy ending is obligatory with cheesy and fluffy fics, of course. 
> 
> OK. wow. done. yikes. first: i can't believe how much i kept to the schedule? like wow, that just doesn't happen with me so even if i missed 3 days, i'm pretty damn proud of myself. second: if i do write smut, as i said it will be a separate thing, but linked through series. i.... don't know when i will? if i do hopefully it'll be within the next week!  
> third: THANK YOU EVERYONE SO MUCH FOR THE SUPPORT. Seriously, you don't know how grateful I am. It means a lot, and I'm so happy you stuck with me and enjoyed it as much as you seemed to!
> 
> I'm kinda sad it's ending? But if I don't stop now, I never will!  
> It's been fun guys, thank you :)
> 
> You can always find me and more of my drabbles on tumblr at [tachibabooty](http://tachibabooty.tumblr.com)!


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